


The BillDip Collection (Non-Sexual)

by SpyroForLife



Series: The BillDip Collection [1]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Angst, Bad Puns, BillDip, Car Accidents, Christmas, Comfort, Cooking, Cuddling & Snuggling, Curses, Demonic Possession, Demons, Dentistry, Fluff, Halloween, Jealousy, Kissing, M/M, Magic, Near Death Experiences, Nightmares, One-Shots, Pumpkin carving, Shopping, Tickling, cipherpines, collection, premature death, prompts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-01
Updated: 2015-09-14
Packaged: 2018-02-23 13:22:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 27,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2549036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpyroForLife/pseuds/SpyroForLife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of my responses to all the BillDip prompts I've been given on Tumblr. These ones are all non-sexual in nature, sexual ones are in a different collection. This will be updated as prompts are written. They're sometimes vaguely related but don't really follow a set storyline. Enjoy~</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jealousy

**Author's Note:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> I read your Vegas billdip thing and I'm in love with your writing!! Ahhh, if you're still doing prompts can you do a jealous/possessive bill who gets mad because dipper did somethin (doesn't matter what I'm sorry this is so vague)

It wasn’t a big deal.

It really wasn’t a big deal.

Obviously, with there being billions of humans on the planet, it would be crazy to focus all your attention on just one.

So Bill definitely did not care that his Pine Tree was talking to other humans while he was at school. The only reason he had decided to spy on him was just… to see what kind of ‘education’ humans received and whether or not he’d have to completely reteach Dipper all of human history.

Of course he would be pretty noticeable if he tried to explore the school in his human body, so he had left it at his house (paid for mostly through his human career as a traveling magician and the rest through slightly less honest means) and followed Dipper in his normal demon form, completely invisible in the mindscape until he wanted to be seen.

After having some fun terrorizing the science club by possessing their hamster, he decided to see what Dipper was doing. Finding his locker was easy. He knew he was in twelfth grade, and there were signs announcing their year all over one of the hallways, so he figured that was the place. Graduation was in about a week and everyone was pretty hyped about it. The energy level in the hallway was astounding. Weren’t high schools supposed to be depressing?

Bill floated over their heads, eye darting from one to the other, looking for a familiar mop of messy brown hair, for that lanky teen with big brown eyes who still had a bit of baby fat in his cheeks. Who still had a horrible fashion sense.

And then he saw him. He was leaning against a locker, talking to a girl with short hair dyed blue. He said something, and then the unfamiliar girl nodded and said something that made him laugh.

That was fine and all… but Dipper was laughing a bit too much, smiling and looking like he wasn’t sure if he should be this happy or not. It was the same way he smiled at Bill, and that stirred something unfamiliar in the demon.

The girl stepped closer to him, and he leaned back slightly, looking away. She touched his face with her hand, and the unfamiliar feeling in Bill grew stronger, beginning to resemble something like anger. He tensed, ready to intervene if this bold human tried to hurt his sapling. But before he could determine her intentions, she was already acting, pulling his face over toward hers and then pressing their lips together.

Bill flew toward them, form glowing red with anger, a new and startling emotion rearing in him. Possession. _No one_ touched his human like that! Only he was allowed to do that!

Dipper immediately pulled away from the girl, eyes wide, and shouldered her aside, sprinting away from her and into the stream of students going to their classes. She stood there, confused and maybe a little triumphant, which pissed Bill off.

"Hey, you living meat sack!" he shouted at her, and though she couldn’t truly see or hear him, a cold chill went up her spine, and she looked around, trembling. He was considering dragging her into the mindscape and showing her what he thought of her audacity. Dipper obviously hadn’t wanted that. She had just done it. The nerve of these humans! Even demons asked for permission before touching someone!

Then he remembered just how shocked Dipper had appeared, and decided to go speak to him first and see if he needed any comfort. Then maybe they could do something about the girl.

He turned and followed Dipper, able to sense where he had gone. After enough time with him, he could almost hear his thoughts, but they were very difficult to pick out from the torrent of emotion and thought and dreams below him. Teenagers had such unorganized minds. But he focused on going after Dipper’s, and soon found him in a classroom that didn’t seem to be used that often. He was standing next to a table, grasping it for support while he panted, a hand over his heart. Judging by the sweat on his face, he had sprinted pretty hard to get away.

Bill reached carefully into reality, just enough to slam the door shut. When Dipper whipped around to see who had entered, Bill pulled the room into the mindscape, allowing him to manifest where Dipper could see him.

"Bill!"

"Hey, Pine Tree." Bill crossed his arms, giving him a long look. "So, what was that about?"

"Oh, uh… you saw that?"

"I told you that I’m always watching you. Who was that, and why was she kissing you? That’s my job!"

Dipper shuffled a little. “Just… a girl I met recently… she’s had her own run ins with the supernatural and I thought she was cool but I guess she had a crush on me or something because she just… well, you saw it apparently…”

"So there isn’t anything going on with you two?"

Dipper stared at him, then smiled. “Bill, are you jealous?”

"Jealous? What, no, of course I’m not… you can do whatever you want, it’s your body…"

"But you don’t want other people kissing me, right?"

Bill was silent for a moment. Then admitted, “No.”

"That’s kinda being jealous, buddy."

"Hmmph. Okay. Fine. I don’t want other gross humans putting their hands on you. You’re mine, got it? Mine!" Bill’s anger flared for a moment as his emotions got away from him, his body flashing red, which would usually startle the other. But instead, Dipper merely reached out and grasped one of his hands, pulling him over to hug him. Something he didn’t normally do when Bill wasn’t in his human body (his corners were pointier than they looked) but this kinda called for it.

Bill could be surprisingly cooperative when shown affection.

"Yeah. I’m yours, whatever." Dipper smiled when Bill snorted and slid his thin arms back around him. His demon body was unbelievably hot to the touch, but he could stand here for a few more moments. Until he calmed down. "Relax, Bill. I don’t like her like that. I won’t let other people put their hands on me if I can help it. Okay?"

"Good. I don’t want anyone touching you."

"I get it. Now, can you calm down and let me go? I have to get to class."

Reluctantly, Bill let go. Dipper backed away, massaging the small burns that had been left on him. He still hadn’t figured out exactly what kind of ‘pure energy’ Bill was made of, but he was going with thermal. Dang.

"So, you sure you don’t want me to go after that girl and torture her or something?" Bill asked as Dipper adjusted his backpack and prepared to walk out of the room. "Just a little?"

"No torture."

"Ah, can I at least torment her? Give her nightmares where her parents turn into horrible monstrosities that want to commit unspeakable horrors upon her?"

"That’s… actually already kinda happened to her."

"Oh. Well I can do better!"

"I’m sure you can, but please don’t. I’ll just tell her off later, maybe she’ll leave me alone." Dipper walked over to the door.

"And if she doesn’t, maybe I can rip her eyes out?" Bill asked hopefully.

Dipper laughed and opened the door, blinking as everything returned to color; Bill had jumped back into the mindscape, but he turned to look at where he was nonetheless, knowing the other would be able to hear his reply. “If she does that again, you can definitely rip her eyes out.”

As he headed to class, he could almost hear Bill’s echoing laughter behind him.


	2. Sweet Treat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> How about a Halloween one with fluff? Lots of fluff

"Okay, admit it," Dipper said as Bill stared at him with an unreadable expression. "You think this is all ridiculous. Just a dumb human tradition, that I’m clearly too old for anyway."

After a pause, Bill’s face split into a wide grin. “No, not at all! I was just thinking how adorable you look dressed as a… what is that, are you some kind of two-legged gryphon?”

Dipper held out his arms, which were enclosed in a rough fabric that made them look scaly like bird legs. Sharp talons covered his hands, and feathers had been attached to the entirety of his upper body. Below the waist, however, he had legs like a lion as well as the tail of one.

To top it all off, a pair of big, stiff eagle wings stuck out of his back, and a thin string tied around his face held a beak in place. Overall, wasn’t bad considering that he made it himself. With help from Mabel, of course.

"Yep," he replied. "I’m the unholy combination of an eagle and a lion."

"I can only imagine what that coupling was like. Oh, the screaming. But look at you with all your little feathers!" Bill walked over to pluck at one, laughing. "You’re such a furry!"

"I am not," Dipper protested, though when Bill embraced him, he automatically hugged him back.

"Are too," Bill replied smugly. "But I think it’s endearing. You humans do all kinds of quirky things, but that makes you fun." He pulled away. "Are you actually going to go trick or treating?"

Dipper nodded. “Yep. I look younger than twenty, right?”

"Pine Tree you look like you aren’t a day over sixteen… it’s those fat cheeks of yours, you look so young."

"Usually I would hate that but it works in my favor this time." Dipper tried to fix the wings of his costume into a better position, but they were pretty much stuck the way they were. "Wanna go with me? You can tell people you’re a magician."

"I am a magician. A very good one. It’s almost as if it’s not just smoke and mirrors…" He laughed as he pulled a flower out of Dipper’s ear.

"Perfect, let’s go."

"Wait, no, I can manage a better costume. Something that might compliment yours…" Bill walked away, thinking about it.

"A horse?" Dipper joked.

"Why, so you can either eat me or mate with me to create a hippogriff?"

"…Maybe not. Well, if you’re going to dress as something, could you make it quick? I want to get out there before all the good candy’s gone." Dipper checked the time.

"Ah, I know just the thing!" Bill rushed off into another room.

"You can transform or whatever in here, you don’t need to…"

"You just don’t appreciate my flair for dramatic entrances." He burst back into view with a blur of feathers as he swung his arms, which had become sharply hooked wings like a falcon’s. He spun in a circle and stopped, holding them outspread, revealing the rest of his body. Covered in yellow fur, also with lion legs and a tail, and he was wearing his hair differently, with more volume that made it look almost like a mane around his face.

A fierce winged eyeliner had been applied around his eyes, and he wore a bronze headband like a pharaoh, and it looked like he still had his triangular earrings on, but they kinda fitted. Because he was a sphinx.

"Whoa, nice," Dipper exclaimed, coming over to examine him. "Is this… wow, you actually grew fur on yourself. And these are real wings!"

"You like?" Bill grinned as the human checked him out.

"Yeah, it’s awesome! But don’t sphinxes have lion arms and the wings are on their backs?"

"Have you ever seen a sphinx?"

"Well, no…"

"Exactly." Bill looked over his shoulder at his tail, giving it a flick. "Ha, this is pretty fun."

"You look really soft." Dipper hugged him, finding that the fur was surprisingly soft. Though not as much as Bill’s real hair, which he snuggled his face against. He smelled like vanilla, which got Dipper laughing. "Dude, are you using the same shampoo Mabel does?"

"I have no idea what you’re talking about."

"For luscious locks~"

"You’re just jealous that I have better hair than you." Bill lifted a wing-arm, brushing it across Dipper’s hair and shaking his head. "So frizzy."

And thus Dipper decided the sweet moment was over. He backed away, huffing and grabbing his Halloween bag. “All right, let’s go, great sphinx.”

"Don’t I get a cool bag with a pumpkin on it?"

"Uh…" Dipper hadn’t expected Bill to want to go with him, so he hadn’t actually bought him a bag. Now he felt bad. "I’ve… got a very special bag for you, actually. Just… in here." He ran into the kitchen, searching drawers before extracting a paper bag, which he drew a pumpkin on using a Sharpie. Then he brought it to Bill, holding it up for his approval. "Will this work?"

Not really knowing the difference, Bill took it. “All right! I bet I can get more candy than you!”

"Oh no you can’t, I’ve been doing this for years, I know all the tricks!"

"Well I know exactly how to threaten people into giving me what I want!" Bill raced toward the front door, Dipper following right behind him.

"Can we please not threaten people on Halloween!"

"I’ll just say it’s part of my costume!"

They were outside now, running through the cool air. “Sphinxes don’t threaten people, they tell riddles!” Dipper called to Bill, who was way ahead of him because of his longer legs and had already targeted a house. Luckily they lived in a somewhat higher class neighborhood so the candy was usually pretty good, and plenty of houses participated. Kids came from all over town to walk around here.

He sighed with a mixture of annoyance and amusement as Bill made an inhuman screech at a child dressed as a ghost, who proceeded to scream and run away. This was going to be a long night.

~ ~

Bill would not stop laughing as they walked back up the steps to their house.

"I can’t believe you did that," Dipper muttered, resisting the urge to glance back at the crying children about a block away.

"Ah, it was all in good fun."

"You told them a riddle that was too complicated for even me to figure out, and then when they gave you the wrong answer, you lit yourself on fire and screamed at them that you were going to damn their souls forever to the underworld."

"Is that not what you do on Halloween?"

Dipper shook his head as he unlocked the door and let them inside. “Not usually. In a haunted house, maybe. But surrounded by tiny elementary school children? No. That’s just cruel.”

"I still don’t see the issue with that." Bill headed for the kitchen, putting his bag down on the table. Dipper did the same, rummaging through it while Bill flicked his arms, making the wings disappear. Once he had fingers again, he went through his own bag.

"Mm, good haul this year. Hey, want some chocolate?" Dipper pulled out a small wrapped chocolate.

"I really try not to eat such things, because then I have to exercise off the extra calories."

"Dude, come on, a few pieces of candy every once in a while aren’t going to make you fat. And even if they did… what’s wrong with being fat?"

"Nothing, just… I like being healthy. I don’t want to do anything to my body that could make it slow down or get sick or anything."

"Again… A few pieces won’t hurt." Dipper unwrapped the chocolate, removed the fake beak from his face, and bit a small piece out of the corner of the treat, smiling at the rich, sweet flavor. Then he held it in his teeth as he pulled Bill over for a kiss.

The demon smirked against his human’s lips, accepting the chocolate from him and holding it in his cheek as he kissed him back, enjoying the familiar tingle of pleasure combined with the sweet taste of the candy. When he pulled away, he chewed it and swallowed. “Not bad.” He reached over to his own bag, removing a lollipop and unwrapping it, tracing it along Dipper’s lips.

He tried to lick it, but Bill pulled it away and popped it in his own mouth.

"You jerk," Dipper said playfully.

"Sorry but this one is grape flavored, I had to keep it for myself."

"Oh, well in that case you can have it." Dipper put his hands on Bill’s shoulders, coaxing him into sitting down so he could seat himself on his lap, cuddling up with him, enjoying the warmth of his ‘costume’.

"Mm… you’re so sweet." Bill took the lollipop out of his mouth so the other could kiss him again, wrapping an arm around him to hold him close. He smiled as the other shifted, rubbing his cheek happily against the side of his face before resting his chin on Bill’s shoulder.

"Heh… I know, you tell me that all the time."

"It’s true."

"I can’t help myself. I just… love you so much."

Bill slid his hand up the back of Dipper’s head, tilting it so he could make eye contact with him, before giving him the most tender kiss of the night. He held it until the other needed to breathe, and pulled back to see him blushing. “I love you too, Pine Tree.”

The way Dipper beamed really touched something in Bill. He was still getting used to this emotion of love, but he was very familiar with happiness. And he liked that he was able to make his partner feel so happy. He never wanted to give this up.

They ended up spending the rest of the night feeding each other candy and watching Tim Burton movies while snuggled up on the couch, and as Dipper rested back in Bill’s arms with his head under his chin, he decided that it couldn’t get any better than this.


	3. Furballs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> BillDip prompt if you're accepting? c: Dipper finds a box of kittens or puppies and he loves them but Bill gets jealous because they're what Dipper's paying attention to and not him so there's a little bit of fluffy jealousy and whatnot ^^ Maybe the dream demon warms up to them? Your choice, whatever you like!

One moment, Dipper and Bill were walking through town, hands subconsciously clasped while they talked and traded jokes and the occasional riddle, both trying their hardest to make the other laugh.

The next moment, the pressure disappeared from the demon’s hand and he realized Dipper was no longer beside him. Whipping around, he saw him sprinting across the relatively busy street, completely neglecting to use a crosswalk.

Normally, Bill would chuckle at his casual disregard of the law. But when that disregard could get his human injured or killed, it wasn’t so funny. “Pine Tree! Hey!” He swung out his arms as he ran after him, causing the world to freeze and go grey around them.

Cars stopped right where they were and pedestrians froze midstep. Overhead, birds were still, their wings partway through flapping, yet continuing to float where they were. It was completely silent.

"Ow…" Bill rubbed his head; using his powers put a terrible strain on his human body. He hurried after Dipper, who hadn’t seemed to notice the disruption. As soon as they were both across the street, Bill released the magic and let everything start up again. Color and noise returned to the world, and his headache faded. "Pines, what has… gotten…" He trailed off as he saw Dipper stopping next to a torn cardboard box, crouching down in front of it.

"Oh my God! Bill!" Dipper reached into it and then pulled out something small and fluffy that made helpless noises.

"What is _that_?” Bill asked, coming over to investigate the squirming thing.

"It’s a kitten! Look!" Dipper turned to him, showing him the animal. Small, covered in soft white fur, with big blue eyes that stared curiously up at Bill. Whatever.

"Oh, an infant cat." Bill glanced at the box. It had a sign on it that said ‘free’, and was filled with three more of the creatures.

"Can we keep it?"

"What?" Bill furrowed his eyebrows. "No. That thing probably sheds."

"So?" Dipper hugged it close to himself, and it began purring.

"I do not need cat fur in the Berber."

"It’s called a carpet you twat. And it’s not like you aren’t constantly vacuuming anyway. Stop being such a neat freak." Dipper was fishing into the box, pulling out a second kitten, this one a mix of brown and black. "Aw."

"What are they even good for?"

"For loving on, of course!" And then Dipper had all four of them in his arms, laughing as they nuzzled at him and licked him, purring.

That didn’t sit right with Bill. He scoffed. “That’s what I’m for.”

"Well, it’s about time you learned how to share." Dipper carefully stood up, too focused on his new friends to notice the stricken expression on his boyfriend’s face.

"Share? Uh… yeah. Of course." Bill shook his head, trying not to notice how his hands were clenching. So what if Dipper wanted to pay attention to those furballs instead of him? He didn’t care. He didn’t care at all. Humans got pets all the time. It was normal. His Pine Tree still loved him.

Dipper kicked the empty box aside as he held the four kittens in his arms. They were curling up and beginning to fall asleep, and he smiled. “Who would want to give up these cuties?”

Bill could think of several reasons to get rid of useless furry animals. But they were making Dipper happy, and he didn’t want to upset him. He liked seeing Dipper smile. “Fine, if you insist on keeping those things, they’re going to be entirely your responsibility.”

"Challenge accepted." Dipper actually placed the kittens into the big pocket on the front of his sweatshirt, tugging out the openings so they’d have plenty of air. They slept on, making little kitty snorts that had him beaming. "Mabel used to have a cat. Hers was a jerk, but I always kinda wanted one of my own."

"So now you have four."

"Well, I was worried that if I didn’t claim them, no one would… or they’d end up with someone who will abuse them. They’ll be safe with me. And I’m sure I can give at least two to Mabel, she wants another cat."

"Good idea. Here’s a better one… give all of them to Mabel," Bill suggested.

"Come on, man. How can you not think they’re adorable?" Dipper removed one from his sweatshirt, giving it to Bill to hold. He accepted it, giving it a scrutinizing look.

Green eyes opened and blinked at him, and it yawned, showing sharp little teeth.

"Hmmph." Bill looked up, but he continued to hold it in one arm. "I’m way cuter."

"Heh." Dipper leaned over to kiss him on the cheek, effectively calming him down. "Yeah, you are."

That was more like it. And hey, maybe the four new additions to the family wouldn’t be so bad.


	4. Dentist Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> prompt- dipper's just been to the dentist to have a tooth pulled or something so he's kinda high off that gas they give him so he's all giggly and when he gets back to the mystery shack and bill finds him, the demon doesn't know how to react. but he does know that he loves cuddly, funny pine tree =)

Now really, this was just ridiculous. Was it really so hard to brush your teeth every day? Preferably twice, but if not, then at least once! It took like two minutes, there was no excuse not to!

Bill continued pacing outside the room, trying not to listen to the sounds of drilling. There hadn’t been any screaming, merely some talk between Dipper and the dentist, as well as the assistant, about the various procedures that had to be done. Bill had clearly caught the words ‘tooth’ and ‘pulled’, and while he had to admit that it was fun to yank the teeth out of wild animals (and the occasional human), he would never do that to Dipper.

But he couldn’t be in the room to make sure he would be okay, so now he could only wait outside of it and grumble to himself about Dipper’s bad hygiene. He warned him about eating so much sugary food. And he has reminded him countless times to brush his teeth. He only brought this on himself. His sister, ironically enough, had excellent teeth. Then again, years of wearing braces would do that.

There was some slurred speech from inside the room, and Bill stopped to listen in. That seemed to be Dipper. They were asking him if there was any discomfort, and he said no.

"Those must be some major painkillers," Bill mused. Human medical technology was pretty impressive. He knew they were stabbing all kinds of tools into his mouth, but there was no pain in his voice. It was just slurring together because his mouth was too numb to move properly.

"We’re about to remove this one," the dentist said. "We’re going to give you another injection of anesthetic. This one will be a little stronger."

"Will I need to be asleep?"

"If the bad tooth was impacted, perhaps. But the way it is, it should be a relatively simple procedure. Can you feel this?"

"No."

"Okay, I’m about to insert the needle. Don’t move."

Bill waited, again expecting at least a small sound of pain, but none came. There was only the speaking of the dentist with his assistant as they went back to work.

Sighing, Bill leaned against the wall. This was going to take forever…

~ ~

After what felt like forever, the dentist opened the door. He jumped upon seeing Bill right outside it.

"You were supposed to stay in the waiting room," he said.

"Pfft, right. Well, how is he?" Bill didn’t wait for an answer, going into the room.

"We’ve cleaned out the cavities and filled them in, and pulled the rotten tooth. Everything went well, there are just some things he’ll need to do… and you’ll need to remind him, because he’s a little…"

Dipper laughed upon seeing Bill, reaching toward him. His hand shook. “Eey ‘ill!”

"What… what’s wrong with him?" Bill wondered, as Dipper grasped his coat and tugged on it, grinning at him. He could see that his teeth had been fixed with white fillings that blended in with the real enamel, and also noticed him holding a piece of gauze in the back of his mouth, which was tinged red.

"Oh, that’s pretty typical. Most people are kinda lightheaded and confused after receiving anesthesia, it will wear off."

"After how long?" Bill questioned as Dipper tugged at him, giggling and close to falling off the chair. He let the human pull him over, and Dipper snuggled against him, continuing to laugh as if he was being told the world’s funniest joke.

"Hmm… it depends. A few hours, probably. We didn’t have to use that much. If it was a wisdom tooth, he’d be worse."

"Pine Tree, stop… ahahaha!" Bill laughed as Dipper nuzzled his neck.

"You’re as cute as a banana," Dipper informed him, grinning. "Like… like a daffodil, or a sunflower, or…"

"Ssh, you need to recover." Bill was kinda unnerved by how his partner was acting. It was very unlike him. He helped him out of the chair, only vaguely listening on the dentist went over a list of things that he should and should not do for the next few days, as well as recommendations for follow-up actions.

"Whoa-a, everything’s all blurry. Hahaha." Dipper swayed on his feet, and Bill tightened his hold. He accepted a piece of paper from the dental assistant, which conveniently listed everything they had just been told.

"Come on, let’s go pay that nice lady at the front desk." Bill slowly pulled Dipper from the room.

"Hey, wanna go get some ice cream? I wanna get some ice cream. What’s the difference between dessert and dolphins?"

"What?"

"Everything! HAHAHA!"

Bill couldn’t help it. He cracked a smile, turning his head to kiss the other, who was happy to respond. They stopped for a few moments, until Bill recalled that Dipper was supposed to be putting pressure on that piece of gauze stuck on his tooth. He leaned back, saying, “You got any more of that gauze stuff?”

"Uh… mm, yeah. It tastes weird."

"Make sure you put a clean piece in after a while, okay?"

"Mhmm. So about that ice cream…"

Bill hugged him closer as they returned to the reception area, going to the desk. “Okay, fine. After this, we can get ice cream. If you promise to brush your teeth afterward.”

"Sure." Dipper fumbled in his pocket for his wallet so he could get his debit card and insurance information, but it was very hard to focus. Not to mention, stand.

But eventually, he managed to pay and get out of the office with little mishap. They walked through the parking lot; or rather, Bill walked and Dipper stumbled along next to him with both arms around him for support.

When Dipper took out the keys to his car, Bill immediately took them from him. “I don’t think so.”

"Hey man I’m good to drive I promise."

"No, you’re not." Bill leaned down to give him a brief kiss, distracting him while he carefully guided him around to the passenger side, opening the door. "Just sit down, Pine Tree."

"Hehe, okay." Dipper pretty much fell into the car. Bill nudged his legs inside, then closed the door. As he walked around to the driver’s side, he shook his head, but was grinning. He had to get some of this anesthesia stuff for himself.


	5. Just a Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Billdip! Dipper has a nightmare about FnaF and thinks of his lamb costume (from the adorable lamby lamby dance!) as one of the animatronics trying to stuff him into the suit. Bill ends up having to calm down Dipper from his nightmare.

"AH!" Dipper jolted up in bed, nearly hit Bill with his flailing arms, and simultaneously tried to jump up and away at the same time, thus leading to him getting tangled in the covers and falling to the floor.

"Pine Tree!" Bill was pretty much dragged into a sitting position, but managed not to fall off too. He instinctively shoved the blanket away, but flinched when he heard the other hit the ground. "Oh, geeze…" He ran his fingers through his hair, sighed, and moved over to look down at him.

Upside-down, Dipper looked back up, breathing hard. He blinked, eyes adjusting to the dark but not focusing anywhere in particular.

"What are you doing?" Bill questioned. As he waited for the shaken human to respond, he glanced at the clock. It was just a little past midnight. His body has only gotten about three hours of sleep by this point. No wonder it felt so sluggish. But his own mind was as sharp as ever, and all his focus was on the other.

Dipper looked around, rolling over and getting to his feet. His breathing still hadn’t slowed, eyes darting around the room. Bill could almost feel the paranoia coming off him. And judging by how wide his eyes were, he still thought he was in the dream. Oh, great.

"I know you’re there," Dipper called, voice wavering slightly. His hands clenched as if he was holding a weapon. "S-stay away!"

Bill was used to the other getting these night terrors, and it usually only took a small tap for him to snap the other out of it. He reached for the other, ready to wake him up, but Dipper jumped back, shaking his head.

"Don’t touch me! I don’t want to die, please, d-don’t…" He was trembling. "I don’t understand why-"

Bill grabbed his arm, eyes glowing briefly as he forcibly pulled Dipper from the dream. As he did, he got a flash of something covered in white fur, shockingly close and moving even closer in jerky motions, its eyes dead and black in unnaturally sunken sockets, almost as if it was a monster in…

Then the image disappeared and Bill was standing there with a panting human in his arms, shaking and covered in a cold sweat.

"Um… Pine Tree?" he asked. "You okay?"

"N-no…" Dipper’s hands clenched into his shirt.

"What was it this time?"

Dipper shook his head. “Nothing. It… it was just another stupid nightmare, it… shouldn’t have even been scary…”

"Can I look?"

"…Yeah, if… if you want."

Bill slid a hand up Dipper’s cheek to reassure him, then put the other hand on his temple, closing his eyes as he focused, opening up a memory of the dream to watch. He could feel Dipper shudder; unfortunately, there was no way he could keep him from revisiting the memory as well.

Everything was dark at first, and then it cleared to show what seemed to be a small office, with open doors on each side. The room was very plain, with old posters and trinkets displaying odd furry creatures.

Oh. Seriously?

"You have got to be kidding me," Bill muttered, and Dipper made an offended scoff.

"It was scary, keep watching!"

"You really need to stop playing that game-"

"No, this wasn’t the scary part of the dream. It was…" Dipper trailed off, and Bill refocused on the dream just in time for a… _something_ to leap into view next to one of the doors, and a hand reached into his field of vision (he was seeing all this from Dipper’s perspective) and slammed into a button, making the door shut.

There was a window, and they watched as the thing twitched and almost seemed to dance next to it. It was an animatronic, Bill could see now. But not like any of the ones from the actual game this nightmare had been inspired by. This one was white, with floppy ears and patches of fur sticking out all over that seemed to hint that it had once been very fluffy, but lost almost all of its coat. It had a cute, giant pink ribbon around its neck.

"Is… is that your Lamby costume?" Bill asked, blinking. The image wavered, and he pressed his forehead to Dipper’s as he tried to keep watching.

"Uh… maybe…"

The dream was beginning to become cloudy; already, Dipper was forgetting about it. But Bill was intrigued, wanting to know what exactly had happened to make Dipper panic.

A few seconds later, he got his answer. The sheep animatronic had torn down the door (something that pretty much didn’t happen in the game, from his understanding) and moved in, its cold hands grabbing Dipper by the neck hard enough to choke him, dragging him out of the room and toward a storage closet. And Dipper just knew what its intentions wore, and screamed and struggled… and that was about when he had fallen out of bed.

After that, everything had been hazy, real images interspersed with the nightmare, just enough to put him even more on edge. Until Bill woke him up completely.

"Okay, I think I’ve seen enough." Bill let the dream fade away, and his vision cleared, allowing him to see the real Dipper again. The human’s eyes were wide. "Was it really that bad?"

"You… you didn’t smell the blood… it smelled like blood and vomit, and its hands were so, so cold and sharp, it thought I was… was one of those endoskeletons that animatronics have in them, but I was just missing my suit… it was gonna… gonna stuff me into one that looked like it…" Dipper made a weird choked laugh. "It’s so stupid, I know, but… but it was startling."

"You don’t say. Ssh, calm down, little Dipper." Bill smiled as Dipper already relaxed; he liked when his partner called him that, though he would always pretend he didn’t.

"I’m not that little," he replied automatically.

"Yeah, you are. Hey, stop shaking, you’re not a leaf. It’s fine, it was just a nightmare! It’s not even a real one. You’re okay, you aren’t going to be stuffed into a sheep suit. Honestly, that’s not even scary…"

"It is when it’s filled with metal and wires and stuff so obviously I wouldn’t fit but Lamby was gonna make me fit-“

A kiss on the lips shut him up. He stared off into space for a moment before closing his eyes and responding, the tension leaving his body and the shivers slowly stopping.

When Bill pulled away, he tapped the human on the nose. “Feel better?”

"…Yeah. A little," Dipper replied. He was beginning to find amusement in the situation now. "Heh, a Five Nights at Freddy’s dream. Maybe I really do need to stop playing that game."

"You really do. That game is hardly worth being the stuff of nightmares. I could show you what nightmares are really made of." Bill’s voice dropped about an octave as he said that, irises briefly flashing red, and Dipper wisely pulled away.

"You know what, I think I’m okay to go back to sleep." He tried to edge by him to the bed, but Bill wasn’t letting him go that easily.

"Watch out, Pine Tree, I’m gonna catch you!" Bill pretty much tackled him, Dipper shrieking in surprise, but abruptly stopping when they only landed on the bed. And then the other proceeded to tickle him until he was crying with laughter.

"Stop, Bill, haha, that’s enough, ahaha, I’m gonna punch you in the face you demon-"

Bill let him up, laughing and moving back as Dipper glared at him, face red.

"So, are you over that nightmare?" Bill asked, grinning.

"Well, the good news is, I’m not thinking about it anymore," Dipper replied, leaning over to retrieve the blanket from the floor.

"Exactly as planned."

"But the bad news is… Now I don’t think I can get back to sleep." Dipper was clearly wide awake, while Bill’s body was reminding him yet again that it wanted to sleep. His eyelids were drooping against his will.

"Seriously?" Bill complained.

"Yeah, but… you can sleep if you want, maybe I can just get my laptop and play a few games… and delete a certain one forever."

"No." Bill wrapped his arms around Dipper and pulled him down next to him as he plopped down, sighing with relief as he let his eyes close completely.

"Nn, let go…"

"Ssh, human. Go to sleep."

"I’m not tired."

"Yes you are." Bill let his head rest against Dipper’s. "You keep forgetting, kid… dream demon.”

"Oh, shit." And that was the last thing Dipper said before Bill’s magic lulled him to sleep.

Bill smirked as he let his own body drift off, stepping into the dreamscape and setting off to find his boyfriend. And to think, that wasn’t even the worst of ridiculous nightmares he’s had to fend off of him…

He didn’t mind doing it, though. Whether it was from actual monsters, or from terrors in his mind, he would protect him.


	6. Large Ham

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> if you still do prompts, can you do one with Bill suddendly having a pig nose (probably cursed) and is too ebarrassed to show it to dipper and mable? And them finding it out somehow when they hear cute noises out of a room thinking its waddles?

"Oink."

Dipper lifted his book up higher in front of his face, narrowing his eyes.

"Snort."

The young man’s face was pretty much concealed by the book he was practically smothering himself with as he tried to ignore the noises.

"SQUEE!"

"UGH!" Dipper slammed the book down onto his lap. "Mabel, can you please get Waddles to stop?" He loved when his sister visited, but he didn’t have quite as much fondness for her pet pig, which went everywhere with her, no exceptions. She’s had him since they were twelve. He was older and bigger now, but still snuggled up to his owner and best friend constantly. And he squealed constantly. Sometimes it was cute. But right now…

"Stop what?" she called from the guest room.

"His squealing and carrying on, it’s annoying! I’m trying to read!"

"Waddles isn’t making noise!"

Dipper cast a suspicious look toward the room, standing as he heard another oink. “Then what was that?”

"…Well, there must be another pig in the house, because my precious baby is napping. Or he was, until you so rudely woke him up.” Mabel came out of the room carrying the fat pig in her arms. He was blinking sleepily, but clearly had his mouth shut. “Bro, I think you’ve finally lost it-“

"Ssh." Dipper held out his hand, and she went quiet. He waited, and then heard soft snorting from another room. It sounded very pig like… what was going on? He went to investigate the sound, which was coming from the kitchen.

Come to think of it, he hasn’t seen Bill in a while. But maybe for once, the demon wasn’t responsible for this weirdness. And maybe Waddles will sprout wings and fly off the roof.

He pushed the door open.

There was a startled squealing noise, and Bill scrambled back, hit the kitchen table, and clumsily fell back onto it. He shouted something that was probably intended to be a string of curses, but instead sounded like a very angry… well, pig.

"Bill?" Dipper asked, feeling an overwhelming urge to bust out laughing. As it was, he had a huge grin on his face. "What rival demon or god did you piss off this time?"

"Oink- oh… ah!" Bill slapped a hand over his nose, which was no longer sharply pointed, but flat and wide like a pig’s snout. "It… it was…" Judging by how his voice squeaked, it was very difficult for him to even speak English. "The uh… Shadowhog."

"The… who?" Dipper raised an eyebrow.

"A… lesser known entity… he rules over all things pork. Utterly ridiculous… And I let him know it. He wasn’t… pleased. He cursed me."

"To talk like a pig?"

"Mhmm. He said it was a great gift, I should be thankful, but… no, it is so not a great gift. I have to make a conscious effort to speak in your language, otherwise…” He reverted into soft little oinks and snorts that was unbelievably cute.

Mabel was in hysterics by this point. She was on the ground laughing, and Waddles had walked over to Bill and was looking at him curiously.

"Oh my gosh, hey, can you communicate with Waddles?" Dipper asked, about to join his sister on the floor. This was just too great.

Bill crossed his arms, glaring daggers at his partner. Feeling a tug on his pant leg, he looked down at Waddles and spat something at him. The pig turned and hauled out of the room faster than he has run in years, screaming.

"Waddles! Bill, you bastard!" Mabel got up in a flash and chased after him.

"What did you say?" Dipper asked.

"I told him he smelled like fresh bacon and was making me hungry." Bill sighed and rubbed his throat. "Okay, enough of this. I need to break this curse. But it’s not exactly easy… this particular creature has very odd specifications for removing his… blessings."

"Do you think there’d be anything in the journals that could help?"

"Maybe. Come on, let’s oink- look. Ugh."

Dipper laughed. “I dunno, you sound really cute when you do that.”

"Help me remove the curse or I’ll annihilate everything you love."

"…Fine, Bill. Don’t be such a… ham."

And as Bill’s cane slammed into the side of his head, he decided it was totally worth it.


	7. Anything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> BillDip prompt- Angst ; Human!Bill verse. Dipper's in a car accident on his way home to Bill, and Bill doesn't know about it until he hears about it on the news or Dipper's conscious enough to send a message or ring him. He doesn't have to die; in fact, I'd really love if Bill were there for him when he finally woke up in the hospital and there's a really fluffy moment of a reunion :'D I sent this one to like, two other authors because I just really need to see this like, you have no idea omg

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a little longer than the others but still pretty good I think.

The air in the room felt heavy. It was quiet except for the sound of machinery in nearby areas, and the speaking of personnel as they passed by the waiting room, only occasionally stopping in to retrieve the friends or relatives of those who had recently been checked in.

Then it was only two people still in the room, and it was almost ten at night. One of them, a young woman barely into her twenties, was crying against the shoulder of a man a few years older. Her distress has only grown worse since getting here, and though she tried not to cry, it just kept happening. But the other was willing to comfort her as much as needed.

“It’s okay, Mabel,” he said to her, eyes closed as he stroked her back. Her arms had been tight around him, but now they were looser; she was worn out, emotionally and physically. But she refused to sit down and relax. “Your brother is still fighting for life. I can feel it.”

“Is… is he going to live?” she asked yet again, voice thick with tears.

The other was quiet, and she squeezed him to get his attention.

“Bill, tell me. Will Dipper live?”

“I… I don’t know,” he admitted.

“What do you mean you don’t know? You can see when people will die!”

“I… I did know when, for him,” Bill said quietly. “But… it wasn’t supposed to be now. That’s all I can say. It… it was supposed to come many years later… but that isn’t always set in stone. Right now it’s hazy. Like… fate is still trying to decide.”

“Isn’t there anything you can do?”

He shook his head. “No. This is a battle he’ll have to fight alone.”

She rested her head against him, and he became immersed in her memories; in her heightened emotional state, she wasn’t able to keep her thoughts from him, especially not when she was this close. He saw yet again what she had mere hours ago; the twisted wreckage of a semi truck laying on its side, trailer disconnected and the crushed remains of a car wrapped around its wheels, pieces of metal and glass everywhere, fuel and other fluids leaking from both vehicles.

The driver of the truck laying on his back while paramedics tended to him, conscious but just barely, blubbering out an explanation about how he hadn’t realized his exit was coming up already, this was a new route, he had switched lanes in a bit of a panic… and the car next to him had been in his blind spot. And semis did not have very efficient breaks.

There was other vehicles parked around, their drivers watching the proceedings, saying what they had seen. There was blue and red flashing from emergency vehicles, police officers directing traffic, ambulances, a fire truck, and firemen trying to get into the car.

Mabel had stopped her car as close as she could to all of it and leapt out, sprinting straight toward the wreck, heart pounding hard in her chest, tears in her eyes; she would recognize that black car with its clever bumper stickers anywhere.

Barely able to breathe, she had yelled at the police officers that she was the sister of the man in the car, that she had been on the phone with him when the crash happened, and had come as fast as she could. She was the one who had called 911.

So she had been allowed closer, but kept a good distance from the car in case the engine exploded. All she could do was run back and forth, watching as the firemen peeled the door off and finally managed to extract the driver.

She had cried out Dipper’s name and run to meet them as he was carried out and toward an ambulance. He was covered in blood; the shattering of the windows had showered him in glass, some of which were still embedded. His head was tilted oddly, limbs hanging limp and angled in directions arms and legs should never be in. And he was deathly pale, eyes closed, and from her perspective, Mabel couldn’t see any motion in his chest. She had assumed he was dead, and had fallen to her knees right there on the asphalt, sobbing hysterically.

Warm hands had helped her back up, wrapping a blanket around her, and helping her to where they eventually laid Dipper down to do a quick examination.

She had watched through blurry eyes as they checked his vitals, while someone else announced that most of his bones seemed to be broken, and he has no doubt lost a lot of blood. And as pieces of glass were removed and the wounds quickly wrapped, the paramedic kneeling at Dipper’s head removed his fingers from his neck and looked up, announcing that he was breathing and had a pulse, though they were both very weak. They would have to take him in immediately, by helicopter. It’s already been called.

Mabel had been simultaneously relieved that Dipper was alive, and terrified that he wouldn’t survive this. His body was completely broken, there was no doubt internal bleeding and ruptured organs they couldn’t see, concussions, bruising… those bones were probably _shattered_ , and she could only imagine how much pain he would be in if he was conscious.

She was too shaken from all of it to handle a phone call, so she had asked someone to take her phone and call Bill for her.

He had arrived in minutes; he would have been there even faster, but humans only had so much willing suspension of disbelief. It would have been too suspicious for him to just show up a few seconds later. He had to arrive as a human would, by car, claiming he had just been in the area and came as fast as he could.

But despite his haste, the helicopter was already there when he got out, and had only been able to see Dipper for a few moments before they loaded him onto it, strapped securely to a gurney and covered from the neck down in a blanket. They had treated what they could in the field using supplies from the ambulance, but the rest would have to be handled at the trauma center in the hospital.

As the helicopter took off, Bill had immediately grabbed Mabel and run back to his car, saying they were going to the hospital _now_. He had been so angry his eyes were red, and she hadn’t argued. It was a good thing she hadn’t pointed out the driver of the truck to him at the time.

Neither has seen Dipper since the helicopter took him away, but this was the hospital he was at, somewhere down the hall being operated on this very moment. They weren’t allowed in to see him during this critical time. His condition had worsened during the trip and he had become very unstable. They had to wait.

The memories of all this flashed by in seconds, but it was like reliving it to Bill. He’s already seen it so many times, and it still made him shake, eyes itching in that way he hated; that way that meant he was close to crying. But he refused to cry. He was upset, but he was going to be strong. He had to believe in his human. The kid was tough. He’s taken on countless horrors. Things that have almost killed him, yet he survived. He would survive this too.

But it was so uncertain right now. He had found Dipper’s mind easily, but it was withdrawn; he couldn’t get anything out of it. He was unconscious, not even dreaming, body heavily subdued by anesthesia, hooked to life support. His heart had stopped once, and Bill had almost panicked when he felt his partner’s aura go nearly black, but the surgeons had been swift and almost immediately started it up again. He hadn’t told Mabel that her brother had died for a split second.

Carefully, Bill had gotten into the heads of the doctors, looking through their eyes at Dipper, listening to their complicated conversations, following their progress on him. He didn’t understand most of what they were doing, but it looked like they were getting him fixed up. Blood had been cleaned off, bones pushed into place, though most of them had been shattered so badly that they had cut incisions into all of his limbs so they could directly access the pieces, connecting them again with rods and screws that would provide the framework for new bone to eventually grow back.

Bill has seen mangled human bodies before. Blood and viscera were nothing new to him. But something about seeing a human laid open with such precision, being operated on with fine tools and kept alive throughout it all, made him very nervous. This was very new to him, and he was sure that they would do something wrong, would kill his Pine Tree with one foul move of an instrument, but no such thing happened.

He felt sniffing against his shirt and decided he needed to focus on Mabel right now. The doctors would keep Dipper alive. He had to believe that. And he had to keep Shooting Star from getting burnt out. He held her more tightly, and gently rubbed the side of his head against hers. He knew cuddling calmed her down, and her muscles did relax a little. He sent her soothing thoughts, easing his way into her mind just enough to gently nudge her upsetting memories away, instead pulling up good ones.

There were so many sweet memories of her and her brother growing up together, all the adventures they had, the love for each other despite their differences and arguments, how they’ve relied on each other and helped each other time and time again. And throughout it all, it was clear how much Dipper had grown to take on a protective role, at first being the brains and then the brawn to her beauty, though she wasn’t exactly helpless. She had improved her fitness right along with him, and there were many times when both of them would team up to beat down a supernatural creature or some jerk that had picked on her in high school.

Mabel actually laughed a little, pleasantly surprising Bill. It was the first time she’s smiled since the accident.

“See, he’ll be fine,” he assured her. “Look at how strong he is. How strong both of you are. Nothing is going to separate the Pines. Mystery Twins forever, right?”

She nodded. “Yeah.”

“You two were born together, right? Well, I’m certain you’ll die together, too.”

That was comforting, by Bill’s standards. Mabel appreciated it. But she still glanced unsurely at the doorway, still waited for someone to come get them and take them to her brother. There was a tension in her she couldn’t shake off. A prickly, almost painful crawly feeling. She could feel how hurt her twin was. She couldn’t explain it, but she just knew his condition was bad. And it didn’t seem to be getting better.

Bill convinced her to come sit down, and they sank onto a couch, sighing; their feet had gotten quite sore from all the standing. Their nerves had been too bad to sit until now, though.

Mabel stared off into space as she leaned against the other, hugging her knees to herself. “Please live, Dipper,” she whispered to herself. “Please… you can’t go, not yet…”

Bill put an arm around her for comfort, then closed his eyes, reaching out to his partner with his mind once more. When he found him, he once again got no response. He was too far gone to even have a presence in the dreamscape. This worried him. Physical forms were so fragile, but a human’s mental form was usually very distinct. He could find out so many things about them just by examining it, but… he couldn’t do that with Dipper right now. All he could feel was his life force, dim and shimmering like an ember about to go out.

And then, in a way he couldn’t describe, he knew. He knew that Pine Tree wasn’t going to make it. Too much blood lost, too much internal trauma, the shock had almost completely shut him down. The only thing keeping him alive was the machine that forced his heart to beat, forced blood to keep circulating through the damaged tissues and organs, through the struggling brain. His lungs were not inflating and deflating on their own either; oxygen was being manually introduced into them.

The realization that Dipper was so close to death had Bill going rigid, hands clenching. He opened his eyes, staring wordlessly at Mabel, who gave him a horrified look. And he realized that she had felt what he felt.

“No!” Her wide eyes begged him not to say what she knew was the truth.

“Mabel, he…” For once, Bill didn’t know what to say. He didn’t want to upset her anymore than she already was, but he didn’t want to lie to her either. Not about this.

“Just tell me… the truth. He’s dying, isn’t he?”

“He… well, I mean… _everyone_ is dying, right? From the moment they’re born, they’re already starting to die… heh…”

She punched his shoulder. “Bill, tell me! You felt it! What is happening?!”

He looked away from her accusing eyes. “He won’t live long. They’re finishing up with everything they can do for now, they’re going to move him to the intensive care unit, but… the trip alone has a high chance of killing him.”

“We have to tell them to keep him on the life support while they move him!”

“Shooting Star, it’s not just that… his mind is just gone. It’s… it’s like he’s dead already, his body just hasn’t caught up yet. Though… I can’t find him in the dreamscape, so maybe… ah, it’s all too blurry to tell.”

“If… if he died, would you be able to find his spirit?” she asked softly.

“That depends on if he moved on or if he stayed here. Something tells me that if he died, he wouldn’t just leave. His soul would remain. He would want to keep watching over you. But I’d be able to find him then. This is so odd…”

“Do you think he’s in a coma?”

“…Maybe.” Bill narrowed his eyes, then stood up. She got up too, and moments later, a nurse stepped into the room.

“Are you with Mr. Pines…” She glanced over Mabel, who looked so much like her brother that she didn’t need to wait for a confirmation. “He’s being taken to the ICU, but you can come see him for a few minutes. He won’t be conscious, but…”

Mabel and Bill were already hurrying into the hall, and the nurse led them to a set of metal doors with no handles or visible means of opening them, an intercom system nearby. She picked up the phone and spoke into it, and after a few moments, the doors opened. After they went through, the doors slid shut.

The nurse gave them a hesitant glance as she stopped outside a closed room. “We did what we could, but… he’s very weak. You’ll have to speak to his doctor, but his chances of surviving the night are slim. I’m sorry.”

Bill said nothing and went into the room.

“He’ll live,” Mabel whispered as she followed. They brushed aside a curtain, and she gasped, while Bill hesitated for a moment. But they went to the side of the bed, staring at Dipper. They barely noticed the doctor who was swiftly hooking him to monitors and another life support machine.

“Pine Tree…” Bill’s eyes flicked over Dipper’s face, unable to really see anything more of him; there was a blanket over him, except for his arms, which were resting on top of them. But those were currently encased in thick bandages except for where the needles slipped in, so he didn’t look at them for long. He looked at his partner’s face for a long time, at the faint blood stains that hadn’t been completely washed off, how pale his skin still was. There were already small lines under his eyes and around his mouth. As well as bruises and cuts that hadn’t needed stitches but were still quite visible.

If there hadn’t been the occasional beat of the heart monitor, Bill could have believed he was dead. He set his hand carefully on Dipper’s temple, shuddering a little at the feel of his matted hair; there was dried blood in it. The contact sent a jolt of sensation through him, and for a brief moment, he felt all the pain he had suffered. He grimaced and clenched his teeth, bearing it the best he could until he managed to shut it out. He focused instead on Dipper’s aura, seeing it much more clearly now that he had physical contact. It was so weak, not even ‘glowing’ as it usually did. It was just barely clinging to him, such a dark red that it was basically black.

“Pine Tree…” His voice finally broke, and the emotion he had tried to hold back flooded through. “No, no, you can’t be dying… you’re too young! Stay here with me!” Bill leaned down, ignoring the doctor’s warnings, and pulled Dipper into his arms. He could feel the hardness of the cast on his chest, and had to tilt his head to avoid the brace on his neck, but hugged him the best he could nonetheless. “Don’t you dare die, Dipper!”

“Bill…” Mabel’s hand touched his back, and she brushed through Dipper’s hair with the other. “You really should put him down… you might hurt him more…”

He didn’t hear, pressing his head to Dipper’s, chest heaving with sobs as he tried to find a thought, a dream, any sign of activity in his mind. It was so quiet and dark, but he kept searching. There had to be something. Anything!

Mabel realized what Bill was trying to do and backed away. Tears streamed down her face, but she took in a reassuring breath and wiped them off, turning to the doctor and nurse, who were both quite annoyed and apprehensive, but they could see Bill’s desperation and didn’t want to make him let go quite yet. “Will Dipper live?” she asked.

They looked at her, and the doctor’s expression became somber as he consulted a folder. “You’re his sister, correct?”

“Yes. And that’s his boyfriend.”

Bill’s distressed call of, “Dipper, wake up!” almost broke her heart, and the two practitioners gave him sympathetic glances.

“Well, it’s a miracle he’s even alive at all right now,” the doctor said, looking back at Mabel. “Many of his organs were damaged from the impact, some punctured by his own ribs. And he needed several blood transfusions just to keep him alive during the operation, he’ll need more in the future, because there’s still internal bleeding that we haven’t found yet. He will show bruising for several days, maybe even weeks. We’ll need to get that under control, and make adjustments to his bones, many of which had to have rods inserted. I’m not sure when, if ever, he’ll get the full use of his limbs back.” He went on to explain everything that was wrong and what had been done to fix it, or what was going to be done.

Meanwhile, Bill held his human, still not giving up. He has never felt so helpless before. He had so much power, but he couldn’t do anything about this. He couldn’t save Dipper. Or… could he?

Demons weren’t supposed to heal. They existed to destroy. To cause chaos and havoc. Destruction and deceit were second nature. But… he had reality altering abilities, did he not? Maybe…

He took in a breath, whispered, “Let me try something, Pine Tree…” and gently laid him back down, setting his hands against his temples.

“Young man, I know you’re upset, but you really shouldn’t be pulling him around like that,” the doctor said to him. “His body needs time to heal… what are you doing?”

Mabel, being familiar with Bill’s power, could feel a disturbance in the air as magic flowed into his body. “You’re not,” she said, eyes wide.

“I am,” he replied, focusing.

“Isn’t that dangerous in your human body?”

“It is. But whatever happens will be worth it if this works.” He closed his own eyes, fingers putting just the smallest amount of pressure on Dipper, ensuring that there was a suitable connection. His own body buzzed with the energy currently filling it, twitching slightly as it threatened to escape. He refined it until it was warm and refreshing, feeling almost like a summer breeze, and knew it was ready. He began channeling it through Dipper, and could sense his body responding, the destroyed tissue flowing back together, reconnecting, fresh bone growing along the metal supports, fusing into whole pieces everywhere it was supposed to.

Bill’s legs were shaking, his own body protesting all the energy it was having to withstand, but he barely noticed. He kept his attention on Dipper, unable to see exactly what the magic was doing for him, but rather feeling it happen. He could feel as his heart began to beat harder, lungs taking in more oxygen than before.

Carefully, he returned Dipper’s organs to their original states, taking a good deal of strain off him. Everything major had healed, and to make it better, Bill could see his aura flaring back up again, and something like a candle flashed in the corner of his vision. Then it took on a familiar shape, and he nearly leapt with joy as he felt Dipper’s consciousness at last.

“I knew it! I knew you weren’t gone, kid!” He pressed a kiss to his cheek, and held him close again, giddy with relief. Dipper was still far from waking up. But he was alive. He was alive and his mind was active and _everything would be fine_ …

Then his muscles went weak, and he collapsed onto the side of the bed, just barely managing to catch himself before he rolled down to the floor.

“Bill!” Mabel got his arm around her shoulders and lifted him back up, grinning and happier than he’s ever seen her. “Did you really do what I thought you just did?!”

“I… I think. He feels so much stronger now…”

“He looks better! Did you really heal him?”

“Mhmm. Oh, that hurts… not in a good way, either. I feel really faint.”

“Focus on breathing. Slow it down a little. But you did it, look, the numbers on those machines went up!”

“That’s impossible.” The doctor was staring at them, at Dipper, and then back at them. Then he leaned down to physically check his pulse, stared, and turned back to the monitors, clicking through various screens.

“Sir, I don’t believe he needs the life support anymore,” the nurse said.

“There is no way he just went through several weeks of recovery in a minute. It’s not possible.”

“It is when your boyfriend is a demon,” Bill said, smirking at their confusion. His mouth was dry and his head was pounding but it was all so worth it.

“Do you think he’ll wake up?” Mabel asked excitedly.

“Hopefully. I’ll check in on him.” Bill let himself into Dipper’s thoughts, having to really push to get in, but he got through the haze, making him mentally ‘wake up’ and become aware of him. He appeared in his dream in his demon form. “Pine Tree, can you hear me?”

“Y-yeah…” Dipper looked at him unsurely, and then around at the solid black that surrounded them. “What… what happened?”

“You got in a car crash, kid. Real bad. You’re in the hospital.”

“What?!”

“But you’re alive. I… I healed you.”

“You can do that?” Dipper asked, voice full of wonder.

Bill would have smiled if he had a mouth right now. “Yeah. I didn’t think I could. But… I did. You’ll live. And you’ll hopefully wake up soon. Do you remember anything about the crash?”

“Um… yeah, I do remember. I was just talking to Mabel on the phone, and then that semi truck changed lanes. I guess they didn’t see me. I tried to get out of the way, but then it hit my car and it was spun under the trailer and… and it all happened so fast, everything hurt, I remember the windows breaking and the top caving in and crushing me, then it just… went black. I… I can’t remember anything else until seeing you, just now.”

“You were almost dead, Pine Tree. Your heart actually stopped once. You shouldn’t be alive. You wouldn’t be, but I saved you.”

“Then I’m glad you’re here.” Dipper took his hand, smiling at him.

“Hey, don’t get too sappy. You’re welcome. I have to go now, find some excuse for the doctors, but… I’ll think of something. Might just brainwash them. Until then, relax, and I’ll see you when you wake up. All right?”

“Yeah.” Dipper embraced him, and Bill ruffled his hair. Then he backed away, and Bill left his mind, returning to his body.

Once he became aware of his surroundings, he blinked and stood up, looking down at Dipper’s physical form. He looked so much better already. That magic had done an excellent job. He looked like he was merely sleeping now.

“Okay, I don’t know what you did, but-” The doctor was cut off as Bill lazily put a hand on his head and altered his memories. Then he did the same to the nurse, and spoke to both of them.

“Dipper was not as bad off as you thought he was,” he said in a neutral tone. “He’s making a great recovery and it’s not suspicious at all. Now leave and let him get some rest. As soon as he’s well enough, take him from the ICU and into a normal room.”

When he removed his hands, they stared for a few moments, then they just sorta nodded and confusedly walked out of the room.

“Wow,” Mabel said. “Sometimes I forget just how powerful you are.”

“You shouldn’t forget it.” Bill smirked as she playfully slapped him.

“I won’t. Thank you, again, I was so worried… I can’t believe you actually saved him, he was so close to death…”

“It was nothing.” Well, nothing except for several decades lost from his own near immortal life. But that was irrelevant. For his Pine Tree, he would do anything. Bill ran his hand over Dipper’s forehead, brushing through his hair and gazing at the birthmark he had been nicknamed for. “I would do it again in a heartbeat.”


	8. Traditional

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> cute lil cipherpines prompt if you want one? a small oneshot to get in the mood of halloween; pumpkin carving! its a pines family tradition to carve a pumpkin the night before halloween and dipper wants bill to join in and so they do it c: bonus points for fluffy and funny moments!

Bill thought he understood all the weird quirky things humans did. But every time he got used to one, they would do something else to confuse him. He liked being spontaneous and unpredictable but… Pine Tree and Shooting Star were really something else. What was with this species?

They were probably halfway through the pumpkin patch when he finally demanded, “Okay, so _why_ are we tripping over orange gourds in a big field?”

"We have to find the perfect pumpkin!" Mabel explained, explaining nothing.

"Why?"

"For a jack-o-lantern, of course!"

Bill cast her an apprehensive glance. “Jack-o-lantern?” He knew lots of things but that didn’t really mean anything to him.

"Yeah, you know… like the pumpkins that got the faces carved into them? And a candle inside so they glow? Jack-o-lanterns!" Mabel waved her arms around, and then dove down onto a pumpkin. "Ooh, I like this one!"

"Oh. Oh yeah, I’ve seen those." Bill watched her examine the pumpkin, Dipper kneeling next to her to check it out as well. "So… basically we’re going to take this thing and cut it open and make it into something entertaining?"

"Pretty much," Dipper replied, giving the pumpkin a small head shake. "This one’s too small. That’s a shame, it has a nice shape."

"Aw, but it’s so cute… but you’re right, we need a bigger one." Mabel put it down and stood up, looking around once more. To Bill, she explained, "We always do really detailed designs, so we need a big pumpkin to hold all of it."

"Makes sense. I guess." Bill looked around too, and then located a plump, round pumpkin nearby. "How about that one?"

"Ooh!" Mabel ran over to it and checked it out. "Dipper, this one looks perfect!"

"Hey, it is pretty good," Dipper agreed.

"Oh man, I bet it’ll make a good pie too!"

"And it’ll have plenty of seeds to roast!"

Mabel grabbed the pumpkin, examining it from all angles, and nodded in approval. “Bill, give me the cutters!”

He handed them over, and she used them to cut the pumpkin from its vine. It took a few moments; the stem was very tough. But she eventually separated it, and gave the cutters back, playfully reminding Bill not to hurt himself with it.

"I do what I want, Shooting Star!"

Mabel picked up the pumpkin now and led the way back to the entrance, beaming. They had already paid before entering; one set price for any pumpkin you could find, as long as you retrieved it yourself. Pretty good deal. As she walked, she happily suggested ideas for it.

"Jack Skellington," she said.

"A headless horseman," Dipper replied.

"A butterfly!"

"Ooh, how about a dragon?"

"How about the screaming souls of the damned?" Bill suggested. The two turned to look at him, and he became very interested in the cutters he was carrying. “You know what, I think I’ll just stab myself with these.”

"Bill, do you want to help us?" Dipper asked.

"Hmm? Help you what?" he replied.

"Carve the pumpkin. It’s kinda traditional for the Pines family, and you’re part of it now. You deserve to help."

"Well, I do like using knives on things…" He thought about it, then nodded. "Yeah, sure! It’s silly, but I love silly stuff! I’ll make this the scariest pumpkin of all time!"

Mabel slowed down a little, walking next to the demon so she could push him with her shoulder. “Aw, thank you, Bill! You’re such a sweetie.”

"I am not sweet, I am a being of pure-"

Dipper cut him off with a brief kiss to the mouth. “A being of pure sugar.”

Bill stared at him, then scoffed and looked away, crossing his arms. “I’ll let that slide, but only because I like you.”

"My sweet little chocolate-"

Bill’s hand covered Dipper’s mouth. “Don’t push it.”

~ ~

They decided to go to Dipper’s house to carve the pumpkin. The kitchen table was covered in newspaper and Dipper retrieved some tools while Mabel began brainstorming designs, doodling several into a sketchpad for the approval of the other two.

Bill made suggestions for the pumpkin as well, but they were either terrible or nearly impossible to achieve without professional sculpting tools.

In the end, they settled on a relatively simple design involving the Moon and fireflies. They voted on it and got two out of three. Bill felt that the fireflies should be replaced with bloody snakes or roaches or something, but Shooting Star was so pumped about the ‘adorable little lightning bugs’ and Dipper was totally on board with her enthusiasm and he really had no say in this. So he went with it.

Mabel began drawing the design lightly on the skin of the pumpkin, and Dipper gave Bill the very delicate task of cutting the top off so they could gut it. Those were the exact words he used when asking him, so Bill agreed quickly. Taking the carving knife, he eagerly stabbed it in.

"I think we’ve made a terrible mistake," Dipper commented as Bill leaned over the table, viciously sawing a circle around the stem.

"This would be so much better if it was bleeding!" Bill said, eyes wide and focused. He looked a bit too much like a serial killer.

"Uh… you might want to calm down," Dipper said, having to hold the pumpkin steady. Mabel, meanwhile, had to pause in her drawing.

"Hold on. And… done!" Bill pulled the knife out, grabbed the stem, and tugged the top of the pumpkin off. "Like peeling back the top of a skull."

Dipper couldn’t help saying, “And you’re familiar with what that’s like?”

"The Halloween of 1990 was very traumatizing for a particular family, all I’m gonna say."

Dipper really needed to stop saying things like that to him.

Next came the task of removing the pulp from inside the pumpkin, which was very messy, and Bill likened it to pulling viscera out of a stomach wound, except not as warm and a bit stickier. Mabel threatened to leave, and for a few moments they bickered and waved knives at each other.

Then Dipper gently tugged Bill’s knife away from him and put it down on the table, giving him a kiss. Bill quickly shifted attention to him, kissing him back. Despite his hands being covered in pumpkin pulp and juice, he set them on Dipper’s cheeks and held him still.

That felt weird. But… not quite in a bad way. Weirdly exciting, actually. Hmm. Dipper reached up with his own hands, setting one on Bill’s shoulder and winding the other into his soft blonde hair. He expected it to piss the demon off. He took great pride in his appearance and probably would not appreciate getting that goo all over him.

Five seconds later, they were on the floor embracing, making out, and giggling like idiots as they smeared pumpkin goo all over each other.

Mabel had completely emptied out the pumpkin and begun carving by the time the two finally got up again, red in the face and laughing, orange liquid and seeds covering their faces and stuck in their hair. She merely smiled as she handed them some tools. “Can you help me cut out the designs?”

"Sure," Dipper replied, getting to it as if nothing had happened.

"I’d love to, Shooting Star," Bill said, wiping his face off with a sleeve. He would definitely need a bath later… but for now, he was strangely okay with being messy. These humans really have changed him. But not necessarily for the worse.

He worked on cutting through the lines Mabel had drawn, listening with amusement to the stories they told of past Halloweens, and occasionally giving Dipper little grins that made him blush. Ah, he loved this family tradition of theirs.


	9. Protective

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous asked:  
> Something hurts Dipper and Bill gets all protective and angry and awesome :'D

Bill had told Dipper this was a bad idea. As much as he enjoyed Gravity Falls, it was for good reason that he had been sealed out of it years ago. It was dangerous enough on its own, but when he was around, it seemed to become even more unpredictable. And demons were seen as worthy opponents to many supernatural creatures. But Dipper and Mabel have been going to Gravity Falls every summer since they were twelve, and Bill really couldn’t refuse when he was invited along.

So Dipper removed the spell that he himself had set into place years ago, and they stood for a few moments outside the sign welcoming them to the old town. The engine of Dipper’s car rumbled idly behind them, but they didn’t return to it quite yet. First, Bill stepped forward to see if it had worked. He crossed the border with no mishap, then turned and came back, nodding.

The three got back in the car and finished the drive to the Mystery Shack, where Stan would be waiting to greet them as he always has, hand over the running of the Shack to them for the summer, and then go on vacation.

Which mostly involved spending excessive time sleeping and watching TV while his niece and nephew handled the business. But they’ve been doing this since they were about sixteen so they were used to it. The only thing different this time was Bill being with them, and after a loud and somewhat violent argument, Stan allowed him to stay. As long as he behaved.

After spending the first day leading tourists around and showing them the many wonders of the Shack (many of which were actual paranormal creatures and objects Dipper and Mabel have collected in their adventures), Dipper was quite ready to get some peace and quiet. Mabel had gotten to work with the finances and said she would be okay with it if he left for a while.

After closing the store for the night, and shooing away a few stragglers, Dipper left the Shack with Bill, who seemed both eager and a little apprehensive.

"It’s nice being back, but the creatures here have no doubt become complacent. They probably don’t fear me like they used to."

"Then we’ll need to change that," Dipper replied. "Shouldn’t be hard."

"No, probably not." Bill slid an arm around his partner’s as they entered the forest.

The walk was relatively peaceful, though. There were owls and deer and insects. The paths were familiar and the scenery as lovely as always. They found a family of fairies at one point, which fluttered around them and offered to lead them to a hot spring. They politely declined, and the fairies backed off, though one flirtatiously flipped Bill’s hair around before it did.

"They were nice," Dipper said as they walked away.

"At least they weren’t pixies."

They walked for a few more minutes, going deeper into the woods. Then a string of cracking sounds made them stop. Dipper grabbed Bill’s arm, whipping his head toward the sound. “What was that?”

"Something in the trees," Bill replied, looking up at the canopy. "Hm… sounds large. Maybe we should move."

"But it’s… it’s not anything bad, is it?"

"I can’t tell. Could be. But stay by me, if it’s a normal animal, I can easily fight it off. And if it’s supernatural… well, maybe it’ll know better than to challenge us."

They took a few more steps, and then the noise came again as _something_ crashed through the trees right above them, much closer. They were showered with leaves and branches. There was a rush of air as it passed.

"Something flying," Bill said, remaining perfectly calm while Dipper cringed and looked around. "About the size of a horse, from what I can tell. We really need to keep moving. I don’t know exactly what it is from here, but it’s definitely not harmless."

"Is it supernatural?"

"Oh yes. I can feel magic coming off of it. Not much, but enough. Its aura is different enough that I can tell its no normal creature. Feels like a beast, though. Let’s not wait long enough to find out." Bill had a feeling it was after him. He’s been challenged before; his essence was like a magnet for the supernatural. And in his human body, perhaps he would be seen as easier prey…

Then they walked through a clearing, and the monster burst out of the trees above them, diving straight at them. The two spun around, seeing a blur of feathers and talons and a beak hurtling toward them, so fast they barely had time to identify it. But Dipper flung himself in front of Bill nonetheless, shoving him out of the way and taking the full impact from the creature.

They both went down screaming, an audible crack resounding as Dipper collided with the ground, the monster’s front feet on his chest. It had a sharp beak for a mouth, and began snapping dangerously close to his neck. He used his arms to block its bites, which soon tore the skin to shreds. He struggled, crying out from the pain, his blood dripping onto his face as he shielded it from the attacks.

"A gryphon," Bill realized, body frozen in shock for a few moments. He had no idea there were any of _those_ in these woods. They were very muscular and aggressive, with the strength and ferocity of a lion and the speed and senses of an eagle. What else could be hidden in here?

Dipper’s yells shook him out of his funk, and he lunged forward, fists clenched. He got in a few blows to the creature’s side, but one of its large wings slammed into him and knocked him away. The collision with the ground forced the air out of his lungs, and he gasped for several moments as he got back up.

"Bill, help!" Dipper shouted, eyes closed and agony on his face as the gryphon reared its head back, his arm captured in its beak, seemingly intending to rip the limb off. Its talons were still on his chest, the sharp claws sunk deep into his skin. His shirt had been completely ripped apart by the fight.

A horrible fury rose in the demon, and his golden irises turned red. Hate and anger flowed through him, and he stood tall, dark magic surrounding him, giving his human body strength it was never meant to have. He tackled the gryphon, hard enough that he easily threw it to the ground. It let go of Dipper’s arm, shrieking, and turned its head to bite at him.

He raised his fist, a red flame surrounding it, and punched it in the beak. It hurt his hand, the skin actually breaking open, but it hurt the monster much more. Its head snapped back, a pained grunt leaving it.

Breathing hard, eyes wide and furious, Bill punched and kicked at it as hard as he could, magic driving on the blows, ripping into the animal until its dark blood was pouring out. And still he didn’t stop, determined to kill it. He hardly noticed as its dangerous feet tore at him, trying to throw him off. It had hurt his Pine Tree. He was going to hurt it more.

Coughing, Dipper rolled over onto his hands and knees, chest burning. He tugged his mangled shirt off, twisting it and then wrapping it around himself as a makeshift bandage. His arms were steadily bleeding, but there was nothing he could do about that. He looked where Bill was fighting the gryphon, shocked to see that his skin had gone blinding white, hair red, a dark crimson aura surrounding him.

Though he was becoming lightheaded from blood loss, Dipper forced himself to his feet, ready to continue the fight if Bill lost. Though it didn’t look like he was losing.

Bill got his arms around the gryphon’s neck and began choking it, feeling his body protesting; no human could handle the full power of all his magic flowing through it, so he had to hold back just enough that the body didn’t burn up. But what he could use was more than enough to kill this creature.

He put more pressure on the gryphon, snapping its neck. Its body went limp, and he fell to the ground with it, holding for a few more moments until he was sure it was dead. Then he let go and got up. He stared at it, chest heaving, becoming aware of pain in all his muscles, bone deep. And it wasn’t the fun kind of pain. He let go of the magic, and as it dissipated, his legs just failed him. He collapsed, appearance returning to normal.

"Bill!" Dipper stumbled toward him, but the other soon lifted his head and got back up, wavering slightly on his feet. He held out his arms and Dipper pretty much fell into them, burying his face against his neck, torn between laughing and crying. "You were amazing! I… I thought we were done for, that thing was tough…"

"Nothing is tougher than me, Pine Tree." Bill stroked his back, flinching as he felt blood. "It almost got you, though."

"Y-yeah, it was vicious. I’m… not sure how my arms even still work…"

"Come on, let’s get out of here. You need help." Bill put an arm around him to keep him steady, and they slowly walked in the direction that would take them out of the woods.

"I think I need to go to the hospital," Dipper said quietly, feeling like he would faint at any moment.

"Definitely," Bill agreed. "I’ll get you the help you need. Don’t worry about it. Just focus on walking."

"I just… can’t get over how great you were back there. Like… wow. I knew you were strong, of course, but didn’t think you could do all that while in your human body."

"It was hard. But I managed it. Anything to protect you, Pine Tree." Bill turned his head to give him an affectionate nuzzle, kissing his temple. "Nothing hurts my little Dipper. _Nothing_.”


	10. Adorable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> riversongs-hubby said:  
> Pompt time plz. Dip and Bill are making out or something and Bill lets it slip how adorable Dip is, and Dipper gets all upset and saying he's not cute or adorable, he's manly! And Bill cuts him off with a tickle or a kiss or something and Dip makes a cute lil' noise and it just ends up with Dipper telling him to quit it as Bill grins and keeps proving the others adorable-osity? :3

"Hehehe."

Bill’s chuckling against Dipper’s lips was enough to make the young man pull back, feeling awkward. It’s only been a few weeks since he became the demon’s boyfriend, and while he was becoming more and more comfortable with him, he was still a little shy.

"Are you laughing at me?" he questioned.

"Aw, of course not." Bill raised a hand, gently brushing the hair back from Dipper’s forehead to briefly admire his birthmark. "I was just thinking… well, it’s nothing."

"What?"

"Just thinking how much fun I’ve been having with you. I mean, this whole dating thing, your parents letting me move in and even giving me the guest room, not that I spend much time in it… it’s all really great." Bill kissed him again, and Dipper made a slightly startled squeak before trying to respond, but Bill was already breaking away and laughing.

"Now what?" Dipper demanded. He usually liked how the other laughed, but not when it was directed toward him.

"Oh, I can’t… You’re just so adorable!"

Dipper stared at him. “Adorable?”

"Yeah! You’re just… so cute!" Bill ruffled his hair. "With your fat little cheeks and big eyes, I can’t believe you’re actually eighteen!"

"Hey, come on." Dipper batted his hands away. "I’m not cute."

"Then what are you?"

"I’m… manly as hell."

Bill grinned. “Really, Pine Tree? Are you sure?”

"Yeah, I’m sure! I’m… I’m a grown man, so I’m not cute or adorable, in fact I could say I’m handsom-" And then he was cut off by Bill jumping on him and tickling him mercilessly. He burst into laughter, falling onto the floor and squirming as the other’s fingers rubbed against his neck and under his arms, trying and failing to push the other. "Come on man, ahaha, that tickles, let go!"

"Not until you admit it!" Bill said happily, sitting on him to hold him down as he continued to tickle him right where he was most sensitive, until he was almost crying with laughter.

Then he let him up, and Dipper’s face was red, hair tangled from his rolling on the floor. While the boy huffed and glared at him, Bill swept him against him with an arm and helpfully fixed his hair.

"Adorable," he said.

"I am not," Dipper insisted.

So Bill reached down and tickled his side, and he made a soft, high-pitched noise like a kitten might, which just reaffirmed what Bill had already said. "Yeah, that’s pretty high on the list of cute noises."

"Quit it," Dipper complained, his blush still bright on his face.

"Oh, the more you deny it, the cuter you become."

"Shut up, you dumb Dorito. How would you like it if I called you cute?"

Bill beamed. "I’d like it because I am."

"Ugh… why do I even put up with this?" Dipper pulled away and headed for the door.

Bill let him go, but right before he left, he called, "If it makes you feel any better, I always refer to you as my sexy boyfriend! Not cute, but sexy! Is that better?"

He took the responding frustrated groan as a yes.


	11. Old Enemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous said:  
> An adventure goes wrong which leaves Dipper getting possessed by another demon who has an ancient grudge against Bill. Maybe it teases Bill about getting close to humans and goes on about how they're so fragile and easy to kill which just ticks him off? Either way, Bill needs to fight the demon but doesn't wanna hurt Dipper's body. Cue the drama and badass!Dipper with hesitant!Bill :D

The cave behind the waterfall was supposed to be just that; a cave. A hole in a rock wall that was probably damp and slippery and filled with bats and frogs, or maybe a bear.

But Dipper had found strange runes on the trees in the area, and had decided to investigate. They were unlike anything he’s ever seen, and brought Bill along to see if he knew.

The marks were unsettling to the demon, but he couldn’t quite place where he’s seen them before. When Dipper gave him a questioning look, he shrugged and said, “They look familiar, but… I’m not sure. If I have seen them, it’s been so long since I have. I’ll definitely think about it, though.”

"Well, there may be more clues over there," Dipper said, pointing out the waterfall. "They say there’s a cave behind the waterfall, and the runes increase in frequency as they get closer to it. What if something is hiding in there?"

"There could be. But it could be dangerous." Bill gave Dipper an unreadable look for a few moments, then they both laughed. "Let’s check it out."

They first tried to climb up the cliff next to the waterfall, but it was so slick with water and smooth that it was a near impossible task. They kept losing their grip and sliding back down. So Bill chose the second route, scooping Dipper up in his arms and using his magic to fly up instead.

"Why didn’t we do this in the first place?" Dipper wondered as Bill located a ledge behind the waterfall and landed, setting him down.

"It’s exhausting," Bill replied, leaning against the wall for support. He sighed, then straightened up, looking around. "Huh, looks like there is a cave here."

"Look! More of those weird symbols." Dipper pointed out one, and then took off his backpack, digging out a flashlight. He shined it onto the wall. "Man, they look old… but surely someone would have noticed these before?"

"Probably. Then again, humans never notice anything." Bill traced a finger over one, narrowing his eyes. "Where have I seen these before…"

"If you remember, tell me." Dipper dug out a notebook as well, copying the symbols onto the page he had started when he found the ones outside.

One symbol in particular really caught Bill’s attention, and he stared at it hard. “This one… It’s an old rune for evil. And when I say old, I mean very old. Like, from perhaps the earliest of human civilizations.”

"Really? Whoa." Dipper came over to draw it. "What kind of evil? Just… evil?"

"Just evil. I believe these came from a very simple alphabet. The beginnings of writing. These might be older than me." Bill backed away, looking around. "This place feels odd. Do you feel it?"

"I don’t feel anything. It’s just… kinda cold and musty in here. That’s all I can sense." Dipper began walking further into the cave.

"Well, pay attention. I’ve taught you how to sense magic, and I get the feeling we aren’t alone in here."

"But if there is anything, you and I can handle it." Dipper shone his flashlight about, occasionally stopping to examine clusters of runes, but was getting no closer to identifying them. And Bill could only make vague guesses on most of them.

Then they came to a spot where the tunnel actually split off into two paths, and they stopped. Dipper looked down one, while Bill glanced down the other.

"Which should we take?" Dipper asked. His flashlight didn’t shine far enough for him to see what, if anything, was at the ends.

"Let me check them…" Bill closed his eyes and held out a hand toward one. It seemed to light up in his mind, revealing that it led to a dead end. "There’s nothing down this side. And on your side… Whoa!" He opened his eyes, jerking his hand back. "There’s _something_ putting off a lot of magic down there. Like, there’s a big opening, and… a heavy magical presence.”

"A monster?"

"No, it’s nothing alive. Well, it feels almost alive. But it’s not a person or a monster or anything. It felt like an artifact."

"A magical artifact? Let’s check it out!" Dipper ran down the tunnel.

"Pine Tree!" Bill chased after him. He was sure it was nothing, but in case it was dangerous, he wanted to be close. This human was way too curious sometimes.

Then the tunnel opened up into a round room with no other paths, and they slid to a stop. Candles burned in small holders around it, and it was empty except for a stone slab in the center. On it sat something that they couldn’t quite make out; the candles were dim.

"Who lit these?" Dipper wondered, while Bill whispered a spell for detecting life. Besides them and some spiders, there was nothing else in the room. He then tried a spell for revealing spirits or other invisible creatures, but again, nothing showed up. Determining that it was safe, he looked back at Dipper.

"I don’t know, but whatever it was, it’s not here now."

Dipper held up his flashlight, but it didn’t seem to be working. The beam simply would not illuminate anything, which made both of them suspicious.

"We’re obviously surrounded by dark magic," Bill stated.

"Obviously," Dipper replied, putting the flashlight away.

"Let me try." Bill held out his hand, a blue flame appearing in it. This did provide light, and he shot it out in a circle around the room, making all the candle flames rise higher. Then he approached the slab. "Now, let’s see what this is…"

Dipper followed right behind him, and when he saw what was sitting on the stone, he gasped. “It’s amazing!”

"What? It’s just a necklace." Bill held his hand right above it to make sure, but it was indeed just a gold necklace with a ruby hanging from it. Very old and very simply made; the ruby had been cut with rough tools, and was still dirty in places. The gold was dull and its diameter thinned in many places, as though its been crushed. Or perhaps it hadn’t been made very well in the first place.

"A… beautiful necklace." Dipper walked past him, reaching out for it.

Too late, Bill noticed that the human’s brown eyes had changed into a bright red. “Dipper, no-“

Then he had snatched up the necklace and held it up, staring at it. The flames on the candles flared, and Bill could have sworn he saw the rune that represented evil flash deep within the gem of the necklace. Expression strangely distant, Dipper slipped it over his head and let it settle around his neck, the ruby sitting over his chest. It glowed.

Bill swore and tried to grab it, but then Dipper’s hand grasped his wrist, squeezing so tightly that pain shot up his arm. He gasped, trying to pull it away, and Dipper twisted it sideways. His expression remained blank, but the pain was so bad that Bill sank down onto his knees. That was not hilarious…

"I will break it," Dipper warned, but his voice was not quite his own. There was an additional layer to it, something dark and sinister.

Bill looked up at him, forgetting about freeing his arm when he saw how dark the human’s eyes had become. The pupils were large and shaped like slits, irises dark red and the sclera a slightly lighter red. “Pine Tree?” he asked, feeling his heart pound harder.

Dipper laughed, but again, it didn’t sound like him. “Is that a nickname for this human? Really, Bill Cipher?”

"Who are you?" Bill demanded, getting to his feet and managing to yank his hand away. He could feel the malice coming from the other, and dread seeped into him as he realized what must have happened. What had been in the necklace, and had taken control of Dipper’s body the moment he put it on… had been influencing him from the moment he laid eyes on it…

"You don’t remember me? Of course, you wouldn’t… not while I’m in this body. Unfortunately, I am still not strong enough to take on my own form. Not since you defeated me eons ago."

Bill only stared, mentally running through his list of creatures he has killed, or attempted to kill, throughout history. Who was ancient enough to… oh.

"Remember me now?" Dipper stepped closer, eyes narrow and angry, but at the same time, he smiled. "Yes, Cipher… what a silly name you go by now. But my name is unchanged. It is…" And then he said it; a name nearly unpronounceable in any modern tongue, impossible to spell. A name laced with magic, that made Bill shudder to hear it.

"How could I forget?" Bill muttered, glaring back at him. "You wanted to destroy the human race before it ever became something significant. But you had been stopped at first. Humans began to form civilizations, and again you tried to wipe them out. And then I stopped you."

"Yes… you have a fondness for the creatures, don’t you?" The other demon smirked, and Bill cringed when he saw that Dipper’s teeth had become sharp. "Disgusting."

"Humans are fun to play with," Bill replied, not liking the hungry look the other gave him. "It would have been a great loss to this world if they were destroyed."

"You’re weak," the monster spat. "You may torment the humans from time to time with your little nightmares and false deals, but there is no denying that you like them! And why? They are so pathetic, so easy to hurt… so easy to kill." It snatched up a rock from the ground, put Dipper’s hand on the stone slab, and slammed the rock down on it. There was a crunch as a few of his fingers broke.

Pain flitted across his face before the ancient demon concealed it.

"Stop!" Bill started to grab him, but stopped when the other held the rock above its host’s head.

"And falling in love with this creature?" it snarled. "This fragile beast? And taking a human body for yourself so you could be more compatible with it. Disgusting. You had so much potential, Bill. We could have worked together."

"Don’t hurt him," Bill warned.

"Oh, I won’t. I’ll let you hurt him." The rock was suddenly thrown, at point blank range, hitting Bill in the face. He jerked back, howling in pain and grabbing his face. Blood ran from a gash under his eye, and without thinking, he punched Dipper in the face.

"Ow! Bill!"

And just like that, Dipper was himself, his brown eyes wide and hurt, full of tears as he stumbled back. Shocked, Bill caught him and tried to apologize.

"I’m sorry, the demon, it- AH!" He jolted as Dipper’s hand came up and grabbed a handful of hair on the back of his head, yanking it back, and a fist collided with his throat. The human’s eyes were red again.

"Your feelings for this creature will be your downfall," his enemy taunted, wrapping both hands around Bill’s throat and squeezing.

Bill struggled for breath, trying to push the other away, but the demon was giving Dipper’s body unbelievable strength as it inhabited it. He couldn’t move it.

"Why don’t you leave this fragile body?" it teased. "You have so much power, and it’s holding you back."

Bill growled, meeting those red eyes and searching for a hint of the human he loved. “For… give me,” he gasped out. Then he pulled his legs up and kicked hard into Dipper’s stomach, throwing him off.

"So you aren’t above hurting this creature," the other demon mused. "There may be hope for you."

"He’ll understand," Bill said, breathing hard and rubbing his throat. He looked at Dipper, reaching through the mental link they shared, assuring him that he would save him. He didn’t want to hurt him, but had to.

After a moment, he heard him think back, ‘It’s okay. Do whatever you have to.’

"Get out of my boyfriend’s body!" Bill lunged forward, his own magic coursing through him now, and slammed the other to the ground. They traded blows, punching each other, their respective powers easily burning and cutting their hosts. It wasn’t as bad for Bill; his body had no mind within it except for his own. But Dipper would have to feel all of this later, and there was nothing he could do about it.

A particularly hard hit snapped Dipper’s head aside, and tears slipped from his eyes. Bill felt an icy terror as he realized that even now, he was feeling the agony of the fight. Yet his body was not his own to control, and the demon controlling him took advantage of Bill’s brief hesitation to land a solid blow on his mouth, knocking a tooth out and making him taste nothing but blood.

Coughing, Bill had to turn aside to spit out the stuff, feeling dizzy. He had to put an end to this, quick. He scrambled to his feet, backing away to survey the situation.

Dipper got up as well, his demon forcing him to stand despite how badly hurt he was. It tilted his head. “Are you going to kill your ‘boyfriend’, Bill? Because that’s the way things are going. Not that I mind. Go ahead, I want to see you suffer.”

Bill has never seen his human look so wounded. And he felt bad knowing that in order to save him, he would have to hurt him even more. But there was no other choice.

He called on the most ancient magic he knew, letting it flow through him, and ran forward. The other ran to meet him, not realizing until it got closer what his intentions were. It tried to veer off, but too late; Bill slammed into it and wrestled it to the ground, one hand on Dipper’s chest to hold him down, the other grasping his head. Blue claws made of pure energy extended from his fingers, and he sank these into Dipper’s skin, piercing his skull.

He screamed, and Bill felt guilty at the pain he was inflicting on him, and told him he would try to make this quick. He pushed the claws in deeper, until he located the demon within him, and took hold of it. He yanked backward, falling back but managing to extract it. The spirit left in a long trail of black energy that made Dipper’s entire body convulse, and as soon as it was out, the human collapsed, eyes falling shut.

Bill kept his hold on the other demon, claws tight and merciless. He tore it apart, relishing in its silent screams, in the pure fear and hate radiating from it. Then it dissipated, and he grabbed the necklace, ripping it off Dipper’s neck and slamming it down. It shattered, and he slapped the pieces aside.

That wouldn’t get rid of the demon permanently. Nothing could do that. But hopefully it would be gone for thousands of years. He turned to Dipper and lifted him in his arms, pressing the back of his hand to his forehead. He felt feverish, and was covered in sweat.

"Pine Tree?" he asked softly, leaning down to touch their foreheads together.

The other’s eyes flickered open, their normal brown color once more. “Bill?”

"You okay, kid?"

"Y-yeah… I think." Dipper reached up to rub his head. "Oww… feels like I just got stabbed."

"I’m sorry, but I had to get that thing out somehow. You’ll be okay, though. A few nights of rest, maybe… a hospital visit…" Bill trailed off, looking at the hand that had been broken by the demon.

"Yeah." Dipper looked at that hand as well, trying to move his fingers and wincing.

Bill helped him up, and they slowly headed out of the cave. “So, what did we learn today?”

"Don’t put on weird magical artifacts," Dipper replied sheepishly.

"And?"

"And if you see strange runes in the woods… just run away."

"Good. I like going on these adventures with you but you come far too close to dying for my liking. First you get mauled by a gryphon, then there was that whole yeti sacrifice thing… and now you get possessed by a demon who happens to not like me. Why did I agree to come to this town with you?"

Dipper chuckled a little, but was so exhausted and in pain that he soon stopped. “Because you just can’t say no to me.”

"Hmmph. Maybe I need to start saying no more often. Before you get killed." Bill held him closer as he felt him stumble. "Still… that must have been something, huh? What was it like, having a demon in your body while you were still inside it as well?"

"Ugh… it was awful. Never doing that again. Everything hurt. It felt like I was on fire."

"Yep, that’s generally how it feels. You’re lucky to be alive and with your sanity intact." Bill noticed Dipper stumble again and decided that maybe he needed to just stop talking and let him focus on walking. "It’ll be fine. You’ll recover. Just lean on me, there you go…"

Though he too was fatigued, Bill gave the other some of his strength, enough to last them for the rest of the way home. And as they walked, he idly reflected that he really needed to stop making enemies.


	12. Yule Love This (Pine) Tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous said:  
> hi i have a cipherpines prompt!! just a short one. its xmas and dipper and bill are putting up the xmas tree but bill is jus cracking jokes because its a PINE tree so he ends up just decarating dipper instead and dipper doesnt even do anything about it because he cant.

Hmm, that would be the sound of Pine Tree’s car pulling up outside.

And that would be the sound of him attempting to open the door, but apparently struggling. Something smacked against the side of the house a few times.

Bill raised his eyebrows, but didn’t get up. Boy, this eggnog sure was interesting. How did humans come up with such weird drinks?

His keen hearing picked up on the sound of swearing, and he casually swirled a finger around in his mug. Maybe he should help. But Dipper was a ‘tough manly man’ who didn’t need to be taken care of. Whatever he was doing, he could accomplish it alone.

Finally, the door opened and Bill heard heavy footsteps.

"Have fun grocery shopping?" he called with a grin.

"You ass," Dipper growled, coming into view as he walked by the kitchen. Across his back was a tree. Not a little plastic thing shaped like a tree, but an actual small evergreen tree with needles that seemed to immediately fill the house with the sharp smell of sap.

Bill couldn’t help inhaling it and sighing. It reminded him of Gravity Falls. Then he got up, coming to investigate it.

"No, I don’t need your help now, I needed it when I was trying to open the door without dropping it."

"If you had told me you were bringing a live tree into the house I would definitely have helped you."

"Well, I wanted it to be a surprise."

"Then stop complaining!"

Dipper rolled his eyes and entered the living room, using his foot to locate a heavy metal thing that Bill hadn’t been able to figure out the function of. Its use became apparent when Dipper shifted the tree, sticking the trunk of it into the stand and tightening screws on the side to hold it in place. When he let go and backed up, the tree stood up straight.

"Not bad. What do you think?" Dipper looked to Bill for his approval.

"…We’re bringing the outside in?"

"What? No, it’s a Christmas tree. You know, for decorating. I uh… have decorations out in the car and everything."

Bill chuckled, waving a hand nonchalantly. “I know about the pagan tradition of dressing up trees during winter holidays. But I just think it’s funny.”

"Why?"

Bill changed the subject. “Let’s decorate it!”

Dipper wanted to press him, but shrugged and went out to the car with him to grab the ornaments, tinsel, and lights. They brought them in and began wrapping the golden tinsel around it.

"Heh… isn’t this amusing?" Bill asked.

"I… guess?"

Bill casually picked up a second length of tinsel, this one silver. “Hey, Dipper… what kind of tree is this?”

"A yule log?"

"Nope."

"Uh… an evergreen tree?"

"Close, but what are they more conventionally know as?"

"Oh, a pin-" Dipper stopped and looked more closely at what he was doing. "Oh you know what, maybe I should adjust this-"

"A PINE TREE!" Suddenly the silver tinsel was looped around his upper body, and he yelped in surprise as Bill deftly slid one end inside the loop and pulled harder, effectively tying it, before wrapping the rest around him.

"Bill! What the… hey!" Dipper struggled, but his arms were pinned to his sides and Bill was tugging him closer using the end of the tinsel.

"Decorating you is much funner," Bill said, smiling. "I think I’d like a shiny tree." He pulled over the box of ‘icicles’, essentially very shiny strands that gave a tree the appearance of being draped in icicles. He began dropping these all over the other, laughing when Dipper just sighed, resigned to it.

"Yeah, okay. Just save some for the tree, all right?" Dipper blew out to get some away from his mouth.

"Sure, sure." Bill examined him, then leaned down again, picking up a box of ornaments. "One more thing… Here we go…" He began hanging them from Dipper’s clothes, and even stuck one on his earlobe. Dipper’s brows narrowed slightly. "What’s the matter? Are you perhaps… _pine_ -ing for a simpler time?”

That one almost made Dipper kick him, but he resisted the urge.

"Well I’m not a hunting dog, but I’d say I have you… _tree_ d.”

Dipper glared at him, but a quick kiss from the other was all it took to make him smile again. “Are we going to finish decorating the actual tree at any point?”

"Sure, sure. You know, you and it do look a lot alike, though. The third Pine twin, perhaps? A long lost triplet? Oh, imagine the possibilities. I bet if you wore a green sweater you’d look just like it." Bill hugged his human, knowing that it cheered him up. "But honestly, yule look just perfect if you stay like this!”

"Okay I think that’s enough puns…"

"Oh come on, don’t be like that, otherwise I won’t buy you that nice _fir_ coat I saw the other day!”

"Bill, I swear to God-"

"Are you a high ranking military official? Because you sure are decorated!"

"Please stop."

"Wow, looks like my Pine Tree is finally growing some needles!"

Dipper turned and walked out of the room. “I’m drinking the rest of your eggnog.”

"You better not you little birch!"

Yet again, Dipper wondered why he thought moving in with a demon with a bad sense of humor was a good idea.


	13. It's a Piece of Cake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> spookyoeve said:  
> BillDip~ Bill wants to do something for Dipper (because Dipper is always doing things for him) so he try's to do what humans do and bake him a cake and it just goes horribly wrong and Dip comes home to the Kitchen destroyed and Bill in the middle of it all but hes happy bill tried to do this for him. (so basically just cute BillDip)

The first thing Dipper noticed when he opened the door to his house was the pungent smell of vinegar, combined with an acrid burning scent much like the stove when something dripped to the bottom of it and stayed there for a few days.

Then he saw the smoke wafting out of the kitchen and quickly dropped the bags of groceries, running into the room.

He coughed, waving smoke aside and going rigid in shock as he saw a tan goop splattered over the counters, messy cooking utensils everywhere, the door to the fridge wide open, and a certain demon holding the oven door open and peaking inside.

"Bill!" he called, and the other quickly let go of the oven, whipping around to face him.

"Pine Tree, you’re back early! I was just not cooking." Bill casually leaned against the oven, smiling cheerfully. Flour was all over his face and arms, though luckily, he was in very casual clothing today. A simple (bright blue of course) tank top and shorts. Currently splattered in flour as well.

Dipper glanced around the wrecked kitchen, going over to a bowl and picking it up to sniff. His nose wrinkled. “Uh… so what are you cooking?”

"I just said I’m not cooking. Don’t you trust me?"

Dipper couldn’t be annoyed at him; he laughed. “Come on dude, seriously. What are you doing?”

"Hmmph. Well…" Bill turned to look into the oven again. More smoke poured out, and he groaned, turning it off. "I wanted to surprise you with something since you’re always cooking for me and whatnot so I was going to make you a cake. But… to be honest I’ve never made one that wasn’t from a box before." He frowned. "Aren’t they supposed to rise at some point? I’ve been cooking this for like an hour and it’s still flat."

"Oh boy." Dipper walked over, pulling the door open more to look in too. "Take it out. And make sure you use oven mitts."

Bill scoffed. “Of course I’ll use oven mitts, I’m not stupid.” He put them on and took the pan out of the oven, tossing it onto the stove.

Dipper flinched at the charred, black mess inside. “Dude… What did you do to this poor thing?” He picked up a knife to poke it with.

"I tried to cook it!"

"Why does this place smell like vinegar? Did you really put vinegar in this?"

"You like that stuff, right? And I know you liked soda, so I found a kind you could bake!"

"Oh God. Did you mix together baking soda and vinegar?"

"Yeah! It bubbled up and ran everywhere, I figured that was good!"

"That would explain the goo everywhere."

"Of course I scooped it back up, but… I couldn’t get everything." Bill looked at the ‘cake’. "This is just insulting. Really, I should be smart enough to follow simple instructions to make a cake."

"You’d think." Dipper managed to cut a piece of the ‘cake’ out of the pan and sniffed it, giving it a curious nibble. There was no taste except what could only be described as ‘burnt’. "Okay, so… how much sugar did you use?"

"A lot. The amount in the recipe seemed like way too little, so I poured in more."

"You do know that too much sugar will prevent a cake from rising properly, right?"

"…no. I didn’t know that."

"So much for being all knowing." Dipper shook his head. He knew he should be annoyed at this mess, but… it was really just too funny. "Ah, Bill…"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks." Dipper hugged him.

Bill seemed surprised, but hugged back. “Really? Even if you can’t eat it?”

"It’s the thought that counts. You went through all this effort to do something for me, I appreciate that. Just… try to follow the instructions next time, okay? Don’t get creative unless you know what you’re doing. Vinegar and baking soda, really?"

"This cooking thing has too many rules," Bill grumbled. "It’s so much simpler to just pour it out of a box and mix in some eggs and milk…"

"Yeah. Hey, how about this? We can clean up the kitchen, and then go to a restaurant for dinner and get real cake. Edible cake. Hmm?"

"Sure." Bill pressed a brief kiss to his cheek, somehow managing to rub flour off on him in the process. "But I’m paying!"

"That’s fine." Dipper stopped him before he could back away, giving him a proper kiss to the lips. Then he said, "If I ask you to help me bring in the groceries, could you do that without destroying them?"

"Of course I can," Bill replied, insulted.

"We’ll see. Let’s get them inside, then try to salvage the kitchen…" Dipper shook his head at the mess before walking out of the room. It was pretty bad, but it wasn’t the worst thing Bill has done. He was so used to this kind of thing that he didn’t even get mad anymore. He was living with a destructive demon. It was inevitable.

And it was very sweet of the other to try to make him something. He appreciated the meaning far more than the outcome, and reminded Bill of this again as they picked up the groceries that had been dropped earlier.

Besides… his partner’s bright grin was more than enough of a gift.


	14. Fate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> teallights said:  
> I was wondering, and if you could do this for a prompt that would be really awesome, what would bill's initial reaction be when dipper really does die? And prematurely, too. Love these billdip stories btw

Bill has been growing increasingly more on edge as the days passed. Sure, he was as chipper as ever, still telling jokes and teasing his human, and having deep, thought-provoking conversations on the side. But Dipper would catch him staring at him with a worried expression before quickly looking away, and sometimes hugging him for a little too long, almost as if he was protecting him from something.

Dipper questioned him on this odd behavior multiple times, but Bill merely shook his head each time and said that it was nothing, he just thought he sensed something, but wasn’t sure what. Dipper knew he was hiding something, but Bill was very clever and excellent at concealing secrets. If he didn’t want to tell someone about something, it would never be revealed.

Eventually, Dipper accepted this. But it was very unsettling to him, the pained looks his partner would give him every morning before putting a smile back on his face, the way he held onto him tightly sometimes and would snuggle him and make love to him as if it was their last day together.

One morning, Dipper woke up to find that the demon was not beside him. He glanced around, brushing his tousled hair out of his face and absentmindedly rubbing yet another sore bruise on his neck. As he pushed himself up on an arm, the door opened, and Bill came in with a large plate of food. A Belgian waffle topped with butter and syrup, scrambled eggs with ham mixed in, grapes and a sliced orange, hashbrowns. He set this down on the table next to the bed, along with a glass of apple juice, and sat next to Dipper.

"What’s this for?" Dipper asked curiously.

"Breakfast in bed. Because… just because." Bill once again gave him one of those worried looks, but this time, Dipper could see true pain in his eyes, a sadness that made his heart ache.

"What’s going on? Why do you keep looking at me like that? It’s like I’m dying or something."

Bill shook his head, looking away for a moment. When he turned back, he was smiling. “Trust me, Pine Tree. It’s no big deal. I just get some… uh, dark demon thoughts sometimes. You know how it is.”

"I know you don’t want to talk about it, but… you’re really worrying me. If you need to tell me something…"

"No, please, stop asking. I can’t." Bill reached over to the plate and picked up a few of the grapes, offering them to Dipper.

The human sighed, but let his partner feed him.

For a few minutes, they just sat together, Dipper eventually putting the plate in his lap and digging in to the waffle. He was hungry, and it smelled great.

"I’ll tell you," Bill said softly. "Tonight."

Dipper nodded a little, feeling an intense curiosity to know what had the other so anxious. “All right.”

"So… what are you doing today?"

"Hmm… probably gonna go see Mabel."

"Of… of course you are."

"You wanna come? She wants me to watch a new chick flick with her… I mean, I totally don’t like those, of course not, but…"

"No, I… have things to do. Souls to damn and all. Ya know."

"Ah." Dipper accepted it and went back to eating, and Bill felt horribly guilty for lying to him. But he couldn’t tell him the truth. He would be finding out soon enough.

When Dipper was done eating, Bill took the plate away and tried to distract himself by doing the dishes. But that didn’t take long, and he soon returned to his boyfriend. The human was already getting dressed, but he paused when the other entered.

Bill came over to embrace him, just holding him close for an unnecessarily long period of time. Dipper had grown used to these lingering hugs, and returned it. He still wasn’t sure if it made Bill feel better or worse afterward, but he would always hug him back.

Suddenly, it was over, and Bill was going past him to lay down on the bed, sighing and resting his head in his arms. “I’m leaving my body for a bit. See you later.”

"Okay. See you." Dipper watched him, seeing his body go limp as he separated his demon form from it and entered the mindscape, invisible. As usual, he went over to make sure the body was still alive. It was, it was just in a coma-like state while Bill was gone. It needed him to move or do anything that wasn’t a necessary life function. It had been built that way.

After a few moments, Dipper finished dressing and left the room. He couldn’t wait to find out what was bothering Bill.

~ ~

"So are you almost here?" Mabel asked yet again.

Dipper laughed as he replied, “Still no. The exit’s not for another few miles, I’m still on the Interstate.”

"Lame. You’ve gotta see this movie, it’s gonna be great! And there’s a new type of flower in my garden, I wanna show you it."

"Ooh. What kind?"

"It’s gonna be a surprise, silly! Hurry up, why don’t you?"

"I’m not going any more than five miles over the speed limit, I am not getting a ticket again."

She laughed, and Dipper grinned as he shifted the phone to his other ear, and pressed his foot just a little harder on the accelerator. “You’ll be fine if you go up to ten. Trust me.”

"Uh-huh. Unless the cops are bored." He looked over at a van in the lane next to him, which kept drifting from side to side. "Okay, wow, I think this other driver is drunk."

"What? It’s like… noon."

"It’s five o’clock somewhere." Dipper had to move his car over so the driver didn’t hit him. "Damn, that was close. She’s swerving everywhere."

"Be careful."

"Yeah, yeah, I’ll probably speed up here in a moment, get away from her…" Dipper looked forward again, focusing on the road in front of him. Then the other driver went out of her lane again, the front corner of the van smashing into the back of his car, hitting it just right to make him lose control. The car shuddered as its right wheels passed over the rumble strip and then into the grass.

Panicking, Dipper didn’t think as he jerked on the wheel, trying to get back onto the road. Too late, he realized his mistake, and the car spun out, its momentum actually making it flip and tumble down the slope on the side of the road, right for the tree line and with no sign of slowing down.

All Mabel heard was the sound of screaming, metallic crunching, and then a loud collision accompanied by the shattering of glass. Another shriek almost made her drop her phone. Then there was silence, and she yelled, “Dipper? Dipper, are you okay?!” When she received no answer, she began to sob. “DIPPER!”

~ ~

"Dipper Pines. Your time has come."

There was a warmth in the dark, something or someone grasping his wrists, tugging him up and away from what had felt like a cold stone prison.

He almost wanted to struggle. Almost wanted to stay, but… this being had kind, reassuring hands, which slid into his as they floated higher, and he had to know what was happening.

Dipper opened his eyes, starting as he saw Bill Cipher, in his demon form, gazing at him with a sorrow he has never seen before. His expressive eye blinked once, and then lowered.

"What…" Dipper looked down too, and realized his body was translucent, lacking substance, barely even there. "Ah!"

"Yeah, it’s… a shock, isn’t it?"

"What’s going on, last thing I remember was getting run off the road, and…" Dipper trailed off, eyes widening.

"So you’re figuring it out."

"Bill!" Dipper stared at him. "What happened?!"

"…It would be easier to show you. Just… please don’t panic. Just know that it won’t do you any good." Bill turned and floated down now, and Dipper followed. Despite the demon’s warning, he was already feeling panic well up in him.

Everything had been faded and nearly white, but now it came back into sharp focus, and he saw that they were over a wide road with many lanes; the Interstate. Trees lined both sides of it, and on one side, a small car was wrapped around one such tree. There were police cars and an ambulance and fire truck parked nearby, emergency responders surrounding the crushed vehicle and working to extract someone from it.

"That’s my car," Dipper whispered.

"Yes." Bill squeezed his hand.

"I… I don’t…"

"Your seat belt had unlatched during the roll down the hill, and when the car hit that tree, it stopped it immediately. You did not stop. Momentum threw you forward, and you hit the front window just right (or perhaps just wrong) enough to break your neck before it broke apart, showering you in pieces of glass. You were dead before the cuts could even bleed, though."

Dipper had gone rigid, staring at Bill, at the car below, and back at him. “I… I’m dead?”

After a silence, Bill reached out to brush his hand through Dipper’s hair. “I’m afraid so. I’m sorry… you were so young. I would have warned you, but… not even I would challenge Fate.”

"Wait. You knew?"

"I knew. I’ve known for a long time this was going to happen. Every day brought it closer, I accepted it, but it was still so hard knowing I was going to lose you. You’re here for now, your spirit is free of its body, and so I can still talk to you. But if you move on… well, I might not be able to see you again. Ever."

Dipper felt tears in his eyes. “What if I don’t move on? What if I stay here?”

"You’d be a ghost, I guess. But it’s an empty existence."

"I… I could stay in the Dreamscape with you, we can stay together." Dipper was close to pleading. "I don’t want to leave you. I want to be able to keep seeing you, and I can’t just leave without saying goodbye to Mabel, and…"

Bill pulled him over for a hug, and Dipper broke down crying against him. “I understand,” he said as he stroked the other’s back. “It’s hard. Death is very hard. But it’s something mortals have to deal with. It’s as natural as birth.”

It was a while before Dipper calmed down enough to speak again. By that time, the responders below had gotten the car open and pulled his body out, and he shuddered as he saw how twisted his neck was, and the cuts with glass embedded in them, though there was no more bleeding without the heart beating.

He could see their expressions of sadness; they knew from the moment they saw him. There was nothing they could do, and they covered his body up so the people driving by couldn’t gawk at it.

"I’m sorry," Bill said again. "A premature death is always the most painful… I don’t make a habit of helping souls to the afterlife, but the young ones are usually the worst fighters. They don’t want to go. But things happen for a reason."

"I can’t see there being one for this." Miserable, Dipper looked away. "I can’t believe this happened…"

"Me neither. I’ve dreaded this day for so long… now, all I can do is just say… I love you. You were the greatest, most impressive human I’ve ever known, and… I’m so sorry at the way things ended for you."

Dipper finally smiled a little. “Well… it wasn’t so bad. I had an awesome childhood fighting paranormal beasts and insane people in Gravity Falls. I had the best sister a guy could ask for. I had good friends and a family who loved me… and a very fashionable demon boyfriend. My life was pretty good, while it lasted.”

Bill smiled too, in that way that didn’t require a mouth. “There’s that optimism. Pine Tree, if you want to move on, I won’t stop you. It’s peaceful out there, you know. Like sleeping forever. Soft, warm, comfortable. Forever dreaming, occasionally waking when someone you love arrives… going back to sleep again.”

"That sounds… pretty nice. Kinda boring, though."

"Indeed. But honestly… you deserve some rest. It’s getting to be time for you to make your choice. You could let yourself be bound to Earth, or let go of it all."

Dipper thought about it. He thought for what felt like a long time. Then he made his decision. He pulled the other closer to him, resting his forehead against him, and said, “Thank you for being there for me. I love you.”

"I love you too, Pine… Dipper."

"Could you… tell my family goodbye for me? That… that I love them and look forward to being able to see them again one day?"

"Yeah. I’ll tell them."

"Okay. Okay, good. I… I guess I’m ready. To… move on."

"It won’t be so bad." Bill wrapped his arms around him, seeing him already beginning to fade away. "And if I can, I’ll come see you. If not… well, I’ll always remember you."

"Yeah. You too. Goodbye."

Bill helped the human to pass on, a role usually reserved for Death, but he had taken the job for this one special person. It was so difficult to let him go, but he did. He eased his passing, and as he returned the goodbye, his arms grasped at nothing but air. Dipper was gone.

For a while, Bill just floated there, reflecting, all his memories of their time together seeming to flash by in seconds. It hadn’t been enough time. Not near enough time. Humans like to say “better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all” but that was ridiculous to him. Now he knew what love was. And he didn’t have it anymore. He was bitter and angry, but above all, sad.

He finally moved, heading back to the house where his human body laid. He had to comfort the family. He would assist with funeral arrangements if needed, get some closure. And after that… he would move on. Dipper wouldn’t have wanted him to be miserable. There was still plenty to do out in the world, plenty of interesting humans to interact with, fun deals to make… he would live as he always has.

But he couldn’t deny that things would be different from now on, and as he left behind the tragic accident that had claimed the life of his love, he allowed a few tears to slip from his eye.


	15. Tis the Season (to be jolly?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous said:  
> Imagine Bills first Christmas with Dipper and here's some junk to do withe that. 1. Dipper LOVES Christmas ornaments and first chance he gets is to go check them out in the stores and bill just "...dipper that one is a triangle can we get it." 2. Bill is scared of Santa "Pine tree your basicly saying this man wearing a red suit BREAKS INTO YOUR HOUSE ONCE A YEAR AND FILLS LAUNDRY WITH CANDY AND YOU LET HIM IN BECAUSE HE SAYS HE HAS PRESENTS." bill calm dow-" "I WILL NOT CALM DOWN"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (btw, not really related to my other Christmas prompt)

Humans were confusing. The things they did was confusing. And as long as he’s been around them, there were still things about them that Bill was pretty sure he’ll never understand. Holidays were pretty far up that list.

He had gotten through the pumpkin-infested, terrifying one where young humans ran around in costumes demanding candy from strangers. Although, admittedly, that one was pretty fun when you chose to ‘trick’ rather than ‘treat’.

And then he made it through the turkey day. Now that was interesting, especially how it was essentially a callback to when a certain group of humans basically mooched food off of another group of humans that they later went on to murder. Getting to eat all that food was pretty great though.

Finally, they were approaching the last holiday of the year, one that was arguably the most exciting and anticipated of all. Christmas.

Bill pretty much let Dipper and Mabel drag him around for all the preparations, only slightly listening as Dipper told of the holiday’s long history (which he already knew) and Mabel told holiday stories from their childhood. They explained that since their family had roots in Judaism, they usually celebrated a kind of combination Christmas/Hanukkah. They would have a tree AND a menorah, lighting the first candle eight days before Christmas, and then one for each following day, and the last one on the 25th. Each day, at least one more present would be put under the tree.

And then Mabel went into the finer details of how she would combine traditional foods for each holiday and Bill just kinda shut her voice out.

They were in a store now, and were wandering through the section that sold decorations. Long strings of lights for houses, shorter strings for trees, in white, blue, rainbow, and other variations. There were ornaments and plastic reindeer and where was that smell of cinnamon coming from-

"Oh hey," Bill interrupted, pointing something out. "Look!" He grabbed a bag. " _Pine_ cones for Pine Tree!” He shoved the bag of cinnamon-scented pine cones into Dipper’s arms and laughed.

He couldn’t help but laugh too, tossing them back onto the shelf. Mabel grabbed the bag and put it up to her nose, inhaling deeply.

"I love cinnamon!" she shouted. "I’m gonna put these in my house this year! I’ve always wanted these and now I can finally get them! Because I am an adult!" She tripped over a box of fake icicles someone had left on the floor. "I’m okay!"

Dipper immediately located the wall of ornaments in every shape, size, and color imaginable and was looking at them with fascination. “Awesome selection this year! Look at these spiral ones! Ooh, and these purple star ones! Oh, oh, the blue with snowflakes, that is so perfect, we gotta get those!”

Bill let him go on for a few moments, and then decided to make his opinion known. “Pine Tree these ones are triangular can we have them?”

As they walked toward the front of the store to pay, Bill trying to convince Dipper to let him draw eyes on all the triangle ornaments, Mabel suddenly let out a shriek.

"SANTA CLAUS!" She threw her items into Dipper’s arms and took off running.

"What’s a santa and why does it have claws?" Bill questioned, watching her with an eyebrow raised. "That sounds familiar, but-" His question was answered when she jumped into the back of a line of children, most holding their parents’ hands, seemingly waiting to go talk to a fat man wearing velvety red clothing sitting on an armchair.

"Dude, you’ve been around for eons and don’t know about Santa Claus?" Dipper asked incredulously.

"Hey, I know lots of things, not everything," Bill shot back. "I pay attention to what’s _important_ , and he apparently is not important, since the name isn’t ringing a bell.”

Dipper couldn’t help digging a bell out of the pile of stuff in his arms and ringing it.

"You’ve been around me too long." Bill went to investigate the Santa man, his curiosity getting the better of him. As he watched, the kid at the front of the line ran to jump onto the fat man’s lap, and immediately began talking to him.

"Okay, so… basically, Santa Claus like… personifies joyfulness and giving," Dipper explained as he followed. "Every Christmas, he comes down chimneys with a sack of toys and puts them under trees for all the good little boys and girls. For those that are bad, he gives them coal. And if you’ve left him a present of milk and cookies in return, he’ll usually take some before leaving. That’s about it. These kids are waiting to tell him what they want for Christmas."

"Wait, so let me get this straight." Bill gave him a worried look. "So on Christmas, this fat man with questionable fashion sense is gonna break into our house, eat our food, and then leave most-likely cheaply made toys under our tree, and then make an escape… back up the chimney? IS HE GOING TO LEAVE SOOT EVERYWHERE?! AND WHAT IF HE ACTUALLY HAS GUNS IN THAT LAUNDRY BAG OF HIS?"

Dipper glanced around to see that, unsurprisingly, people were staring at them. Then he said in an undertone, “I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have guns in his sack. He just loves children and wants to make them happy with gifts.”

"That’s what every pedophile in a white van says before abducting someone. Mabel, get out of there!" Bill shouted.

"No way!" she yelled back, bouncing as the line moved forward. "This year I’m finally gonna ask Santa for a car! AN ELF MADE CAR, BILL! I AM NOT PASSING UP THIS CHANCE."

He turned to Dipper, shaking him. “We have to rescue your sister! I don’t trust those mitten hands!”

"Dude, calm down-"

"I will not calm down!"

"There has clearly been a miscommunication here. Santa isn’t dangerous. Seriously."

"Do you expect me to believe that someone who apparently has the power to squeeze through chimneys despite his bulk, know who is good and who is bad, and get to all their houses within one night to leave presents, isn’t dangerous? I don’t think even I could do all that!"

"Bill, come here, I’m gonna let you in on a secret." Dipper leaned over to whisper in his ear.

For a few moments, Bill was silent. Then he said in a whisper, “Wait, so he’s not real?”

"Nope," Dipper whispered back, since they were close enough now that the kids could hear. "Just made up by parents to add a little whimsy to their kids’ lives. Like the Easter Bunny. Or the Tooth Fairy."

"Actually the Tooth Fairy is real. And you won’t believe the tooth fetish she has."

"Okay, I didn’t need to know that… But yeah, that’s just a guy in a costume. There is no Santa."

"Well, dang. And I was just starting to plan my anti-jolliness cannons that I was going to install around the perimeter. They would launch fat-seeking missiles…" Bill looked truly bummed out about it. "I still don’t trust that bearded old man letting children sit on his lap, though."

"To be honest… me neither." Dipper shifted the stuff he was holding into one arm so he could wrap the other around Bill’s waist. "Hey, how about this? As soon as Mabel’s done, we can go back home and start decorating a tree. I’ll even let you draw eyes on these ornaments if you want."

That immediately cheered Bill up. “Hell yeah! You’re the best, Pine Tree! Boy, I can’t wait to go home and decorate our other pine tree!” After laughing at Dipper’s exasperated expression, Bill ran off to check out the tins of holiday cookies.

Dipper’s first Christmas with Bill was going to be interesting…


	16. Confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous asked:  
> if you're still doing prompts, how about Bill getting the kind of love feeling where he sits somehwere a long time trying to find out what is it (and probably gets really annoyed and frustrated) and tries to get it away but he still cant stop thinking about dip dop and when hes near dipper hes suddendly sweet and all and it confuses both, dipper and bill?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I am so sorry it took me so long to get back to these, I just hadn't felt like writing for a while. Anyway, here's another prompt, and I'll probably be posting more soon)

Pine Tree really was a ridiculous human. He was obviously intelligent, but his bravery and curiosity often had him throwing himself into dangerous situations, and even worse, putting his sister at risk as well, since she hardly ever let him go anywhere alone these days.

So of course, Bill usually followed him when he went on such adventures. Pine Tree and Shooting Star were both excellent at defending themselves, especially now that they were in their late teens and had the height and muscle to be formidable against most creatures.

But Bill knew what kinds of beasts lurked in the woods of Gravity Falls, and one wrong step could put them within view of something far more dangerous than a phoenix or gnome. There were gryphons out here, and manticores, perhaps even a dragon or two. Even if Pine Tree has taken to carrying a gun loaded with silver bullets, and Shooting Star twin daggers imbued with several spells, that wouldn’t protect against beasts like that.

The teens knew Bill followed them. They were used to him being around, and actually appreciated his protection, though they rarely admitted it out loud. He didn’t need them to, though. He could hear it in their thoughts and see it in their dreams.

Pine Tree, in particular, seemed to appreciate him. And in fact, went out of his way to be around him. Bill enjoyed the human’s company. He was smart and inquisitive, always asking questions and trying to glean information about everything and anything he could think of. Bill humored him, never giving him the full truth, but rather, leaving subtle hints and codes that he would have to figure out for himself.

The boy was quite adept at this.

Bill found himself just watching him for a while, currently inhabiting his human body. The origin of which Dipper didn’t know, and Bill didn’t plan on telling him how he had obtained it. Dipper had known better than to continue asking about that.

Dipper was working on one of the more recent riddles Bill had given him, and the demon was lounging on the bed watching him, occasionally giving hints that usually just confused him more. As Dipper groaned in frustration and actually smacked his head against the desk, Bill chuckled. That was cute.

…Wait. Did he just think of the human as cute? Sure, he’s called him adorable before, but that was entirely in a condescending fashion. He.. he didn’t actually think he was attractive… did he?

Bill watched the other silently, tilting his head thoughtfully. Dipper was now chewing on a pen, and a sort of tingly feeling seemed to start in his chest. Then it became more of a warmth, and he noticed that he was smiling. What…

The demon quickly got to his feet, pacing.

"Bill?" The human turned to look at him, and his big brown eyes only made the feeling worse.

"Don’t look at me," Bill snapped, quickly getting frustrated. Was his body just acting up? Had it gotten sick?

Pine Tree raised his eyebrows, and got up, completely ignoring Bill’s order. “Are you okay?”

"I’m fine. I just… my body’s doing weird things again." Bill looked away, going to gaze out the window. Resting his head against it, he looked out at the forest. This made him feel a bit better.

"Do I have to give you the sex talk again?"

"What? No, it’s not doing anything like that." Bill turned back around to look at him again, and saw that he looked concerned and unsure, and something about his expression made Bill feel that warmth again.

"Want to talk about it?"

"There’s nothing to talk about. I feel weird and I think it’s because of you, when I’m near you, looking at you work and try to solve the mysteries of this town, I just… I don’t know, this body starts to feel warm and tingly, and I… I don’t know why. There’s like… a clenching sensation. Here." Bill gestured at his chest.

Dipper tilted his head, and came closer to him. “In your heart?”

"Y-yeah." Bill suddenly grabbed him, shaking him. "What is this feeling?!"

Face growing red, Dipper pushed him away. “I don’t know, I think it’s just… you probably like me or something!”

Bill stopped and let go of him, yanking his hands back as if burned. “Like you? I mean, yes I like you, but I’ve liked you since you were like… twelve! Why would I just now be feeling this?”

Dipper shook his head, looking puzzled. “Well, uh… I really don’t know, man.”

Bill turned away. “I need to think. See you later, I’m heading out.”

"Oh. Okay. Good luck, I guess." Dipper stepped back and watched him run out, then returned to his desk, massaging his forehead. "Huh. I wonder what’s up with him… he seemed pretty upset. Hmm. Looked kinda cute, actually…" He slammed his pen down. "Wait what." He suddenly understood what Bill had been talking about, and quickly jumped back up. “Bill! Bill wait!” He got up to chase after him.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t find him. He ran around outside the Mystery Shack, and shouted for the other so loudly he could hear his voice echoing through the trees, but he got no response. He gave up, sadly walking back inside.

"Hey, bro-bro, what’s going on?" Mabel asked as he went through the living room.

"Bill’s being weird," Dipper replied.

"Oh. Well, that’s normal."

"I… I think he’s in love with me."

She stared at him, putting down the scarf she was knitting. “What? Really?” she asked excitedly.

Dipper nodded, sighing heavily as he flopped down next to her. “Yeah. It’s pretty bad.”

"What’s so bad about that?"

"Because…" He looked at her helplessly. "I think I’m in love with him too."

~ ~ ~

Bill didn’t come back for several days. During that time, he did a lot of traveling and thinking, trying to sort out his feelings for the male twin, wondering when he had grown to care about him, and why so much? He was a demon, he shouldn’t care for a mortal.. and especially shouldn’t be getting icky, tingling affection feelings for one.

But he couldn’t stay away from them forever. When they slept at night, he could still sense their thoughts, their dreams, which often wondered where he was. So he returned to them, using his human body, letting himself right into the house and going to speak with Pine Tree.

The boy met him halfway, throwing himself into his arms and hugging him tightly. At once, the warmth flared in him, glowing in his cheeks, and without thinking, he hugged him back.

Shooting Star was standing nearby, smiling widely, knowingly.

"Hey, um…" Dipper leaned back, looking at the other. "I know you’re probably confused… but you are a demon, you probably don’t feel like this often. But that feeling you’re getting? I think it’s love."

Bill sighed, letting go of him and stepping back. “I think that’s what it is too.”

"Yeah. But it’s no big deal… nothing to get upset over. It’s a normal emotion."

"It is. Just… I never thought I would feel it." Bill looked away.

"Don’t fight your feelings," Mabel advised. "Just let it happen."

Bill grumbled to himself about humans and their sentimental natures, and was promptly hugged again.

"It’s all right," Dipper said. "Really. I um…" He looked over at Mabel, who gave him a double thumbs up. Then he looked back at Bill and said, "I… love you too."

Mabel squealed, and Bill blinked, staring at Dipper. “You… you do?” He didn’t expect the sudden feeling of happiness he got. He found himself grinning, and holding him tightly. “I’m so glad to hear that!” Realizing he was being a bit too emotional, he pushed the other away, coughing. “I mean.. hmmph. I’m a powerful being of pure energy, you should love and respect me.”

Dipper just laughed and shook his head. “Yeah. Well, do you feel better now? After confessing?”

"I… do," Bill admitted. "Just… don’t go around telling everyone." He pointed at Mabel. "Same goes for you, Shooting Star."

"My lips are sealed," she replied, doing a little zipping motion over her mouth to prove it. Then she bounced. "Aw you two are so cute, though!"

"No I’m not," Dipper replied automatically.

"You are pretty cute, though," Bill said.

"What? I’m not!" Dipper protested, blushing.

"You’re so adorable, Pine Tree," Bill teased.

Face burning, Dipper fled the room. The two chased after him, laughing and calling cute nicknames after him, while he indignantly yelled back at them.

Bill decided he could have chosen a worse human to fall for.


	17. Chill Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous asks:  
> If you are still doing Bipper prompts, I'd like to request one. Fluff? Perhaps Bill gets locked somewhere freezing cold (a freezer, arctic, Hoth, doesn't matter) for an unknown amount of time until Dipper gets him out?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ended up not being too fluffy but oh well, lol  
> Word Count: 1440

Really, this was just embarrassing. Bill Cipher has lived for tens of thousands of years, traveled the entirety of the planet, was knowledgeable on countless topics and could avoid almost any type of danger with hardly an effort at all.

So how the hell did he manage to lock himself inside of a meat freezer?

“Pine Tree! A little help, please?” he called as he pounded on the inside of the door, glaring out through the little window. He didn't see anyone in the immediate area, and sighed, turning to check out his surroundings. It sure was a meat freezer all right. Slabs of varying meat hung from the ceiling, chilled, some even covered in frost. He glared at what seemed to be an entire half of a cow, silently blaming it for this situation.

When the slab of raw meat didn't offer up any solution to his problem, he returned to the door and began examining it. Surely there would be a latch on the inside? To prevent one from getting locked inside? He found a handle, sure. But it wouldn't budge.

“What the hell,” he complained as he let go of it. He tried to punch the door. Nope, that didn't work either. And now his knuckles hurt. Damn it. He took a deep breath and shivered, watching as his breath puffed back out. It was really cold in here. He guessed that was why it was called a freezer. With a scowl at the door, he began exploring the room, pushing the hanging meat aside, wondering if there was another way out, or maybe some kind of release for the door.

He wasn't able to find anything. There was definitely meat though. Hanging from the ceiling, stacked up on shelves, and just generally all over the place. He began examining labels. Ooh, chicken. Hopefully Dipper bought some of that. That's why they came here in the first place, to this privately-owned meat market. It was run by a family that supplied most of the meats and crops, though it was also supplied by other farms in the area. It was a good place for getting good quality but cheap meat.

And Dipper was most likely still looking for a particular cut of pork. Bill, meanwhile, had elected to go check if it was even in stock. Which was what had led him to sneaking into the back and finding their meat locker. Which he had walked into. Not noticing the door swinging shut behind him.

He was soon bored of his exploration, and returned to the door, beginning to pound on it. “Get me out! Someone! Hey!” He cursed the fact that he was unable to use his powers through a human body. It was incredibly inconvenient. He needed to figure out a way around that. Maybe he could use a spell of some sort? Though that would probably require him to leave his human body, and then pull it into the Mindscape, and then use his magic on it... too much effort. When instead, he could just stand here and scream for help.

He began hitting the door over and over again, rattling the glass, squinting through the fogged surface as he tried to look for employees. There had to be someone working back here, right? They would find him eventually. Maybe. At the very least, someone would come to check on the locker by closing time. He just had to be patient.

Luckily, Bill Cipher was good at being patient.

“I fucking hate this place,” he swore as he sank down to sit on the floor, leaning back against the door and wrapping his arms around himself. He was shivering rapidly now, teeth chattering. He could feel his breath freezing as it left his nose, the frost solidifying on his skin. He huffed with annoyance and rubbed it away. Maybe he should leave the body behind and go find Dipper using his demon form. Of course, if Bill wanted to communicate with him, he would have to pull him into the Mindscape. Which would make him pass out in the middle of the store.

Okay. If no one has found him within an hour, then he would do that. For now, he could just sit here, and think about his place in the universe.

...If he could he would fight the universe. Place is awful.

Minutes passed slowly as he sat there, trying to get used to how cold it was. He was currently wearing a short-sleeved shirt. This sucked. He enjoyed winter, when he was wearing a thick sweater and pants and gloves. But sitting inside of a freezer in a shirt and shorts was horrible.

He kept checking his watch, regretting not carrying a phone. He had one, but he had left it in the car because Dipper had one. Well that didn't help him much now.

It was at about the point that the tips of his fingers were going numb when he decided that he was tired of waiting. He stood and moved away from the door, laying down next to the wall and separating from the body. Once he was returned to the welcome gray of the Mindscape, he took a moment to just enjoy no longer having to feel the cold. Then he flew through the wall and went to find Dipper.

He found the human walking briskly through the aisles, looking around, expression unsure. He was calling Bill's name, phone in his hand. Apparently he had already tried calling him before realizing the phone was in the car.

This was going to be fun. Bill flew in front of him and used his magic to knock him out. He was asleep before he even hit the floor, thus allowing his soul into the Mindscape.

“What the- wait, Bill?” he demanded as his soul stood, briefly leaving the body behind. It continued to just sleep on the floor. “Where are you?”

“Right here,” Bill snarked back, crossing his arms.

“I mean your body.”

Bill examined his fingernails casually. “Oh, that old thing? Freezing to death in a meat locker.”

Dipper's eyes widened. “Wait, how did you get into a meat locker?”

“Through the door.”

Dipper resisted the urge to swat at him. “Where?”

“In the back.” Bill gestured toward the door that led to the receiving and storage area of the building.

“Oh my God.” Dipper started to walk toward it, then paused, glancing around at his grayscale surroundings. He sighed. “Okay, I'll be right there. Can you wake me up?”

“Sure. Hold on.” Bill snapped his fingers, and Dipper woke up. He hurried past Bill, no longer able to see him now. Bill flew ahead of him, jumping back into his body and forcing it to its feet. He shook, stretching and rubbing his hands together. His joints felt stiff. He breathed into his palms, and then turned to the door. It was only a few more seconds before it was being thrown open, and Dipper looked in. Seeing Bill, he glared at him. The demon grinned and walked over to him. “Thanks for helping me, babe,” he said sweetly, pressing a kiss to the other's cheek.

“Don't touch me.” Dipper shoved him back, but not as hard as he could have.

Bill just laughed and passed him, sighing at the warmth outside the locker. “Come on, Pine Tree. It's not like this is the worst thing I've done.”

“Sadly, no, it's not. But I'm still fairly annoyed.”

“You'll get over it.” Bill headed out into the main store. Dipper followed him, and as they were going through the aisles and picking out the food they had come for in the first place, one of the employees approached them and politely but firmly informed them that the security cameras had caught them in the back, and would they kindly leave the store right now?

Dipper sighed as he shoved everything onto a random shelf and stalked out of the store. Bill laughed as he followed him. “I'm sorry.”

“No you're not.”

“Okay, I'm not.”

Once they were in the car, Bill waited for Dipper to be buckled in, before leaning over to kiss the corner of his mouth. “Forgive me?”

“Nah.”

When Bill gave him an offended look, Dipper rolled his eyes and said, “Okay, I'll forgive you for being a dumbass. But when we go to the next store, you're staying in the car.”

Bill shrugged. “Fair enough, I have Pandora.”

Dipper put the car into Drive and drove out of the parking lot. Dating an insane dream demon made even the most trivial of tasks exhausting.


	18. Meeting Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anonymous Asks:  
> PLEASE WRITE BILL MEETING DIPPER'S PARENTS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as it says on the tin. Bill gets to meet Dipper's parents. Things go... all right.  
> Word Count: 1331

Introducing a partner to one’s parents was usually a pretty nerve-wracking affair. No doubt the parents would have high expectations of the person who dares to date their child, and of course, one had to worry about whether or not their partner would behave themselves.

And for Dipper, whose partner was a literal demon, the event made him even more anxious.

Unlike a typical person who is being introduced to their loved one’s parents, Bill was completely at ease. He barely knew the meaning of the word ‘nervous’, and held Dipper’s hand firmly as he walked with him up to the front door.

“They really don’t know what to expect,” Dipper told him. “I’ve barely told them about you. To be honest, I haven’t been sure what to say.”

“Hey Mom, hey Dad, this is my boyfriend and he’s the demon that used to terrorize me when I was younger,” Bill suggested. When Dipper gave him an unimpressed look, he shrugged. “Okay, okay. ‘Boyfriend’ is hardly a fitting term, is it?”

Dipper sighed and opened the door with his free hand. “Well, let’s get this over with.”

His father was there to greet him in a heartbeat. “Hey, you made it! I didn’t know if you’d have time with your busy schedule, and- oh, is this...?”

Dipper nodded and let go of Bill’s hand. “Dad, this is Bill Cipher. My uh... datemate.”

Bill reached out to take Mr. Pines’s hand, shaking it firmly. “Greetings, Mr. Pines! How wonderful it is to meet you at last!” He grinned. “You remind me a lot of your uncle!”

The man gave him a confused look.

“I met him in Gravity Falls, he knows Ford,” Dipper explained.

“Oh, all right. Um, thank you.” Mr. Pines let go of Bill’s hand, and looked him over, brows knitting together as he took in the combination of skinny jeans and a thick yellow sweater that the strange man was wearing. And was that a black bow tie? And _earrings_?

“Oh man, something smells delicious,” Bill commented, walking past him and sniffing.

Dipper offered a shrug to his father as he followed. “He’s kinda quirky,” he explained.

“I can tell. Is he wearing make-up?”

“He likes eyeliner. Says it makes him look fierce. Which I totally agree with.”

“Ah. Well, um... when you first started talking about him, I was kinda surprised... never thought you’d swing that way, you always seemed more interested in girls, but uh...”

Dipper decided to just go ahead and nip that one in the bud. “Pansexual, also Bill’s not a man. He’s agender. I’ll explain later.”

His father was clearly confused, but decided not to question. They entered the kitchen, where Mrs. Pines was fixing up the table for dinner. She looked up, and beamed at the sight of her son. She ran over to hug him, ruffling his hair before squeezing him tight.

“My little Dipper! So good to see you again!”

“Hey, Mom!” He hugged her back, and when he separated, gestured to Bill. “This is Bill Cipher. My partner.”

“Oh, hi!” She took his hand, and he leaned down to kiss the back of her hand, giving a small bow as he did. The woman placed her other hand over her heart. “My, such a gentleman!”

Bill smiled as he straightened up. “I do my best.”

They were soon sitting down at the table and placing helpings of food on their plates.

“So, Bill, how did you and Dipper meet?” Mr. Pines asked curiously as he cut into his steak.

“I’ve known him since he was twelve,” Bill replied, through a mouthful of mashed potatoes. Dipper sighed, not even bothering to tell him off. He wouldn’t listen.

“Ah, okay. And you met in Gravity Falls?”

“Yep.” Bill swallowed and took a drink from the cup of soda he had poured earlier. “He was quite nervous around me at first... scared even. But as time passed we put our differences aside and became very good friends. And while he was in college?” Bill shrugged. “I suppose magic happened.”

Dipper snorted. That was one way of saying that the demon seduced him with odd gifts of animal parts tied into necklaces. Or maybe it was the chocolate-covered insects that really got to him. He still wasn’t sure, but it worked. Bill’s idea of romance was a bit odd but he found it endearing. Even now, Bill’s idea of a good date was exploring haunted houses and spelunking in nearly-bottomless caves that have driven people mad trying to escape. Go big or go home, apparently.

“What do you do for a living?” Mrs. Pines asked.

“Hmm...” Bill paused to think about it, then said, “I make deals with mortals sealed with their very souls and if they refuse to pay up their end of the deal, then I ensure that they suffer greatly for their transgressions.”

“Oh, you’re a lawyer!”

Dipper shoved more food in his mouth to keep from laughing.

Bill grinned. “Well that’s certainly one way to put it.”

Dipper decided not to comment. He just kept eating. “Wow, Mom, this steak is really good!”

“Isn’t it? Without you kids around we have money to afford steak like this all the time.”

“Haha, wow!” Bill laughed. “I think the steak is great! Could be a bit bloodier, though. I love the taste of blood.”

“I’m sorry, I would have made it rarer if I knew you liked that.”

Bill cast a meaningful glance at Dipper, and the human heard him in his mind. _I wonder how long it’ll take for them to realize I’m not human._

 _Most people don’t just assume that a guest is a demon, no matter how many strange things they say,_ Dipper pointed out.

_Well, I’m gonna keep hinting._

“So, how old are you?” Mr. Pines said to Bill.

“Older than this galaxy, at least,” Bill replied as he buttered a roll.

Dipper rolled his eyes. Well that pretty much proved he wasn’t human.

“That’s... quite an exaggeration,” Mr. Pines commented.

“Not an exaggeration, I remember when the Milky Way first burst into life, along with all the other galaxies at the onset of the Big Bang. Man, what a great time that was. Things were so quiet back then.”

“Isn’t our galaxy like 13 billion years old?”

“Mhmm. I miss the dinosaurs, they had so much potential.” Bill crammed about half of the roll in his mouth at once.

Dipper could see that his parents were having trouble processing the things Bill was saying. So he sighed and reached over to put a hand on Bill’s shoulder. “Mom, Dad, he’s a demon.”

“Wow way to drop the ball.”

That certainly got their attention.

“A demon?” Mr. Pines demanded, staring at Bill. The blonde grinned and held up his hand, a blue flame erupting in it. Dipper’s parents scrambled back from the table before they realized the flame wasn’t spreading, just sitting in Bill’s palm.

“What is that?” Mrs. Pines shouted, clearly not wanting to come near it.

“Magic,” Bill replied. “Ya know. Because I’m a demon.”

Dipper watched his parents, waiting for their response. He was fully prepared to defend his decision to date a demon nearly as old as their universe, prepared to explain that this wasn’t a trick and Bill really was playing with fire, but-

“Well, _that_ explains a lot,” Mr. Pines said.

His wife nodded in agreement. “Yeah, definitely explains that blood comment and the overall quirkiness.”

“Wait, you guys are cool with it?” Dipper asked in disbelief.

“Our family’s always been weirdly involved with the supernatural. Considering that you met him in Gravity Falls, I’m not even surprised,” Mr. Pines admitted. “So Bill, what kind of demon are you?”

“Do you know any other magic tricks?” Mrs. Pines added excitedly.

Bill beamed and drew himself up proudly. “Why, I’m glad you asked.”

Dipper groaned. They just had to ask Bill to talk about himself. This was going to be a long dinner.


End file.
